I'm not hot, but....hello? Hello? Anyone there?

You mean you can be fat AND happy? Hmm...weird. I just assumed that you should be ashamed of yourself for being unworthy of skinny respect. Well, way to go! You just keep your head up fatty. You're so brave. ("Fat" of course means anyone that looks like they've ever eaten bread. Most people would call it "normal", but that's a bit of a stretch I'm afraid.)

Tonight's episode of Cold Case was about a suave (hot) guy who scams undesirable women. He finds fat women, charms them because they are desperate, and then he steals all their money. Later on he starts marrying them and killing them, he makes more money that way.
This show brought to mind the fact that skinny girls and fat girls are from completely alternate universes. Though us fat girls are superior to skinny girls in several ways, we will always be generally defective. There are fat girls that are just as pretty as skinny girls, but skinny is still skinny; it's what society prefers.
There's this emphasis on "real beauty" and whatnot lately. That's lovely and all but they're just frosting the cake to feed to the over-eaters. It doesn't actually mean anything. It just makes people feel better. It's like when they put minority, handicapped children in catalogs. It looks nice. Have a look around...I don't see any fat, hispanic, wheelchair bound, women on TV. I see girls with shiny hair, flawless skin, and pointy shoes, wearing a size 4. None of my friends look like that.
I suggest a girl who is maybe a giant size 12, with uncooperative hair, tennis shoes, and jeans. What's wrong with normal? There are a few TV females with personality, but they go overboard. If she doesn't look like the pointy-shoed types then she's a nut case. But hey she's quirky!
I will say this--the quirky ones and the pointy-shoes with all their lip gloss tend to be somewhat smart. So, we are women, we are judged on our looks but at least the men and television show writers now achnowledge that we do have brains. Isn't that sweet of them.

Movie: Stranger Than Fiction

Starring- Will Ferrell, Emma Thompson, Dustin Hoffman, Maggie Gyllenhaal and Queen Latifah.

Well, it's funny. I saw it last night at 7:05 and I'm still thinking about it. It's not rolling-in-the-isles funny, it's more like huh... funny. All the characters are ACTUAL characters. They are all bizarre people, who live in their own little worlds.
Will Ferrell is not Will Ferrell in this movie if that is of concern to anyone.
While watching this movie I was sort of wondering what the point was but once you get to the end--you smile. I gave it a B+ (Memorable) rating on Yahoo, but I think it could even get an A for sheer creative amusement. I definitely want to see it again--it's one of those that I really feel I need to see again to properly understand.
If you don't want to pay for the theatre, then at least rent it when it comes out. It has a very interesting after-taste.
I almost forgot to mention the fun song at the end of the credits. I believe it's called "Love You", and it's a little bit terrific.

Academic Rant

So here's the thing...all* of my English teachers are so pompous and arrogant it makes me kind of want to kick them.
Do they not realize how utterly ridiculous they sound? Not just English profs of course, I'd say a majority of professors are like this. At least the men are. The women tend to be much better about not sounding like complete fools.
Professor A: If something is not academic then it automatically has less value than something that is academic. If he thinks it's a good idea then it's a good idea. If he thinks it's a bad idea then it's a bad idea. So out of touch with anything non-academic that I think he might actually be crazy.
Professor B: So-called grammatical errors can be "bad form". Grammar is life, it matters so much to the harmony of life. Does he realize how ridiculous this sounds?? Because I do! Decent grammar is nice, but when you think the placement of a comma is of the highest importance then you are an idiot. (I do realize what you do for a living by the way. :) But I'm speaking of the academic side of this crap. Totally overdone.)
One prof likes things one way and another likes them different. These guys cannot actually keep themselves from saying some haughty remark, or huffing in a disapproving way to illustrate that they think that other prof is silly.
Question: Who the fuck cares?
The whole point of any of this is to be able to successfully communicate something (thought, idea, whatever) to someone else and have them understand. I am perfectly capable of doing that without all my commas accounted for.
I can articulte and explain a good many things to more people than many of my "lettered" professors. You may know big words, and you may know when to use who and whom but no one wants to listen to someone who thinks they are smarter than everyone else.

(* By all, I mean most.)

Update: The Book

The Book is updated. Lots of new and exciting stuff!
Check it out.

http://www.geocities.com/kathayj/TheBook.html

Happy Guy Fawkes Day! Give a penny for the Guy.

"The only verdict is vengeance, a vendetta, held as a votive not in vain."
~V~

Remember, remember the fifth of November, gunpowder treason and plot.

I know of no reason why the gunpowder treason should ever be forgot.

And the rest of the poem:
Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes,'Twas his intent.

To blow up the King and the Parliament.

Three score barrels of powder below.

Poor old England to overthrow.

By God's providence he was catch'd,

With a dark lantern and burning match
Holloa boys, Holloa boys, let the bells ring

Holloa boys, Holloa boys, God save the King!
Hip hip Hoorah !Hip hip Hoorah !

A penny loaf to feed ol'Pope,

A farthing cheese to choke him.

A pint of beer to rinse it down,

A faggot of sticks to burn him.

Burn him in a tub of tar,

'Burn him like a blazing star.

Burn his body from his head,

Then we'll say: ol'Pope is dead.

"People should not be afraid of their governments. Goverments should be afraid of their people."
~V~

Halloween

Happy November!
I thought I would update you on my Halloween festivities.

On Monday night I went to the English halloween party (it was in my old neighborhood, very weird). I was dressed as Miss Piggy and I won a prize for Best Cultural Critique-tied with Uma Thurman from Pulp Fiction, post-overdose.

From there I went to Morbid Meditations Upon Dark Spirits-Ghouls Gone Wild, the annual Halloween theatrics from Dr. Luehrs, a former History professor.
On Halloween night we went and had pancakes, watched a dumb movie and I attempted to do some homework. The boys came to visit at least, so that was the excitement of the day. Tanner was Dash from the Incredibles, and Jordan was Syndrome (the bad guy).

I don't get trick-or-treaters here in the alley so the boys were the only visitors. I also had a sign on my door that said "Trick-or-treaters will be fed to the cave troll", that might have had something to do with it.

To see more pictures you can try here but I'm not sure if it'll work. Let me know!http://new.photos.yahoo.com/kathayj/albums/

Movies: The Prestige and lots more.

Starring Hugh Jackman, Christian Bale, Michael Caine, and David Bowie. (Seriously.)
Good Friday night fun I thought. It has lots of twists and crazy stuff going on. I found myself figuring out the secrets just moments before they told me.
I hear it's similar to The Illusionist, however I don't recall Hugh, Christian or Michael in The Illusionist. I'd certainly recommend at least renting this if you don't get to see it in the theatre. I was pleasantly surprised that I got to.

What else have I been watching lately?
-The Wolf Man (1941) Starring Lon Cheney Jr. A fun classic! I really liked this, and Lon Cheney is just super.
- The Howling, starring Dee Wallace Stone (aka- Mom from E.T.) Very 80's but surprisingly entertaining. Very creepy in a um...ok sort of way sometimes, but I still liked it. Probably don't want to watch it if you don't like good old 80's horror.
- Silver Bullet, starring Gary Busey and a tiny Corey Haim. Even lamer 80's fun. Totally Saturday afternoon movie. Same advice as above.
- Wolf, starring Jack Nicholson, James Spader and Michelle Pfeifer. How Michelle got hired after this I do not know. I hope whoever wrote the script got fired. "You think I can't get bacon?" That shouldn't be said. Spader is quite hillarious, Jack is ok. Keep your eyes open for David Schwimmer....bet you didn't know he was in this.
- Van Helsing, starring Hugh Jackman, David Wenham, Richard Roxburgh. Had potential. They should have killed the woman in the first (maybe second) scene and just had Van Helsing and Dracula have it out. Then it would have been much better. I had a good time watching it because the monsters are excellent (with the exception of the Harpies, soooo anoying). This contains my favourite werewolf next to Remus Lupin. (I did a speech on werewolves if you were wondering what the deal is.)

- Where the Truth Lies, starring Kevin Bacon and Colin Firth. Terrible. A few moments of entertainment surrounded in crap.
- The Snapper, Irish movie that Colm Meaney and Brendan Gleeson can't make good enough to watch again. Very annoying.
- The Muppets Show, Season 1. It's a bit slow in places and you can ALMOST get Muppet overload (thought I did watch it for days at a time) but it's just terrific.
- I'm still making my way through the Bond collection. I'm on Diamonds are Forever now. (Plenty O'Toole HAHAHA, who writes this crap?) I skipped Goldeneye because my DVD didn't work but I'll fit it in somewhere. The last few have not been very impressive.