Boulder County DA: Dynel Lane attacked Michelle Wilkins with lava lamp
When I first saw this article pop up on my newsfeed, before I'd even read it, I thought to myself: "God, I hate that woman."
It was automatic. It was pretty reasonable. It was understandable.
Very quickly I stopped myself and the new thought was: "No...that's not what Michelle wants."
Whatever Michelle's feelings about this woman are, they're certainly more complex than mine.
I'm no Buddha, I'm not enlightened and crap. I hate plenty of people. Or I have at some point. It tends to go away after time. It just becomes less relevant, if nothing else. I'm outwardly emotional about things. I love stuff, I hate stuff. Moves, cookies, sandwiches, people, cars, animals, songs, chairs. Whatever. It's not really stuff that's important enough to earn a TRUE love or hate label. But I don't think there's anything wrong with professing my love to a cookie. If you feel it, then just tell the cookie you love it. Tell the thing you just stubbed your toe on that you hate it. Express yourself.
But this...this is different. This person did something worthy of hate. It doesn't do any good though. Hating a person is kind of pointless. It doesn't actually help.
Say you HATE getting mugged when you walk to your car at night so you do everything you can to avoid that...useful hate.
I hate going to the ER because of my gallbladder so I'm managing my diet. Useful.
When I first saw this article pop up on my newsfeed, before I'd even read it, I thought to myself: "God, I hate that woman."
It was automatic. It was pretty reasonable. It was understandable.
Very quickly I stopped myself and the new thought was: "No...that's not what Michelle wants."
Whatever Michelle's feelings about this woman are, they're certainly more complex than mine.
I'm no Buddha, I'm not enlightened and crap. I hate plenty of people. Or I have at some point. It tends to go away after time. It just becomes less relevant, if nothing else. I'm outwardly emotional about things. I love stuff, I hate stuff. Moves, cookies, sandwiches, people, cars, animals, songs, chairs. Whatever. It's not really stuff that's important enough to earn a TRUE love or hate label. But I don't think there's anything wrong with professing my love to a cookie. If you feel it, then just tell the cookie you love it. Tell the thing you just stubbed your toe on that you hate it. Express yourself.
But this...this is different. This person did something worthy of hate. It doesn't do any good though. Hating a person is kind of pointless. It doesn't actually help.
Say you HATE getting mugged when you walk to your car at night so you do everything you can to avoid that...useful hate.
I hate going to the ER because of my gallbladder so I'm managing my diet. Useful.
Hating a person does nothing.
The quote I was trying to think of last time I talked to Michelle about this topic was: "Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned." (Pretty sure it's a Buddha thing.)
Nobody would blame anyone for being angry about the situation but wouldn't it do more good to not put energy in to that side of the equation?
It has to do more good to think about the other side. We (Jason & I) love Michelle. She's lovely and kind. She likes Harry Potter. She's thoughtful and positive. And as Jason put it, she's like Wolverine; she can't be destroyed.
We would have loved Aurora too.
Sending hate out to this woman who changed the course of things is almost like taking away the love that should have been going to Aurora.
So instead of thinking about how much I dislike that woman for what she did for reasons that I'm not able to comprehend, I'm going to think about how much I support and care for Michelle because that brings both of us up and honors the memory of Aurora. You can't do all that with hate.
