I brought this up with my husband recently and since I was thinking about this for a few days I thought I'd get the words down.
There are 3 things we hold up as pretty darn important: (In general, as average human beings.)
Our happiness.
Our passions.
Our stability (most often via economic success in some sort.)
My theory on this is that very few people ever find all 3 in equal amounts.* I'm not saying it's good or bad, just that most people are leaning more toward 1 or 2 and away from another.
(*This depends on their methods of operation.)
The equations are like so-
If you're happy and work doing something you're passionate about, there's a good chance you don't make a bunch of money.
If you work for decent profit doing something you're passionate about, there's a good chance it doesn't make you as happy after a while.
If you're economically successful and happy, there's a good chance your passions and causes are less of a factor than they once were.
Yeah, I'm sure there's some guy out there who is sitting on his yacht full of joy about his Google stocks cash that he uses to feed stray cats or whatever but I'm talking about the rest of us.
This is particularly relevant to creative people. It's hard to just DO what you want when you also want to try to make a living at it.
If you want to be a economically successful artist (at least in the beginning) then you're probably going to have to be doing work on someone else's passions.
BUT. If you do what makes you happy and what relates to what you feel is the most important EVENTUALLY someone else will come along with some cash and say "hey! I also find this important and awesome! Take my money!" It's the side door to artistic success rather than coming up the front walk hoping that people feel your vibe.
Other people have different theories.
Some say don't get into a job involving something you love because it'll become corrupted and you'll end up hating it.
Some go with the "if you build it, they will come" plan. Risky, but I'm sure it works sometimes.
Some people find enough happiness in the non-passionate parts of life that they can make up for it.
Some simply just take the chance, do what they want, and if they make the money then it's great and if they don't then they're still happy.
It's not all about money though. People hold economic success at different levels of importance. It shouldn't be the same for anybody.
Income and/or affluence (lots of affluent people don't have normal "income" but have plenty of money) is problematic because it's wrapped around how society sees us, how we feel about ourselves, how healthy we are, how educated we are, how available we are, how free we are.
Think about how you react when someone cuts you off in traffic.
New BMW..."what a jerk!"
Junker rust bucket..."idiot!"
Soccer mom van..."pay attention!"
Same car as me..."grrr...oh look, same as me!"
There's so many layers here but I'll just tackle a couple. I'm also doing some grand generalizing. I know.
We see a nice car and assume the person in it doesn't really care about the rest of us.
We see a crappy car and assume the person in it is not too bright.
When we see a car similar to ours, or one we like, we want to form an alliance with them against all other dumb cars that are in our way.
We make assumptions based on this stuff all the time. It's lame but we do it.
There is a comfort level when things are similar to our realm of understanding. Somehow there is this expectation that others understand as we understand. There's also people who fall into the opposite belief that nobody understands them and nobody is like them. Neither of these is true or false. Isn't it a fun existence?
The point here is that if you are driven to create then you MUST create for yourself. If someone is paying you then it is not for you and you're not digging up what you really want to produce. Not at first.
If you want to make money, and you are attached to the creation part and not the outcome part, then give your skills to others and hopefully it equates to happiness. #Win
If someone sees enough of YOU and they see that sameness and understanding then they want to give you money to create for yourself because they understand that you represent them as well.
This is not to say that creating for yourself is always fun. It sucks. People feel like they can comment. On you. On what you created. People know that you don't go visit your friend with the new baby and say "oh wow...he's not going to be attractive." Nope. They cherish the spawn they have created and you appreciate that by not being a jerk for no reason.
Who do you know that likes every part of you? Not even your mama and daddy like every part of you. If you stood yourself in the corner of a gallery would someone come over and tell you that your pants are stupid? Probably not. They'll do it to art though. The art is the artist. The artist is the parent.
Basically...where do you get off saying what you like or don't like? You don't need to like it.
I don't like all your kids. Doesn't mean they aren't your most cherished creations that will hopefully be functional members of society who serve a purpose.
This relates to my life because I try to encourage my artist husband to do what makes him happy rather than what will be profitable. (Or at least I advise to separate the two.) He'd be pleased to make a living off of art. It's difficult. Not that he's known for taking the easy way in life but even so I try to sometimes make things easier in life when I can. If he was delighted to create a 9 foot tall sculpture out of soup cans in our yard, I'd say do it. Cans are pretty cheap.
People feel completely ok telling him if they don't like his art. My desire to make life easier for him in that situation is to start that person on fire. But that would make everything worse so I don't.
I don't know if people have the idea that he won't care because he looks like a badass or what. He cares but it's also part of the art package. Everyone is a critic. Don't even GET me started on the number of tattoo experts on the planet.
Why do we tell our kids that their unidentifiable creature on the fridge is amazing and tell adults that something they put their heart into isn't? Constructive critique is a different matter for an artist but I'm talking just regular random interaction here. We are both pretty harsh "modern art" critics but that's because it's not about the end result. It's about the PROCESS. Modern art is completely pointless unless you know who did it, in my opinion. If you don't know the meaning then you're just looking at nothing. It all has some hidden code or whatever. Once you know what the point is then maybe it's amazing. Maaaaybe it's still a swoosh and a dot but then at least you know why?
One moral of this I guess is: treat people like human beings regardless of how they look, specifically ones I'm married to or otherwise fond of, or I'll hate you and visualize you on fire.
I could say a whole bunch in relation to this stuff but it'd turn into a book and I have a meeting in a little while. Plus, there would probably be outrage and swearing and TMI.
In conclusion, if you don't love my husband and his art, that's ok. I know he'd paint in his own blood if he thought you'd appreciate it. I know how he feels about his art and how much he puts into it. He puts more effort into pleasing people with his work than I generally even consider doing. If that's not what's relevant to you then fuck off and watch out if you see me with marshmallows.
There are 3 things we hold up as pretty darn important: (In general, as average human beings.)
Our happiness.
Our passions.
Our stability (most often via economic success in some sort.)
My theory on this is that very few people ever find all 3 in equal amounts.* I'm not saying it's good or bad, just that most people are leaning more toward 1 or 2 and away from another.
(*This depends on their methods of operation.)
The equations are like so-
If you're happy and work doing something you're passionate about, there's a good chance you don't make a bunch of money.
If you work for decent profit doing something you're passionate about, there's a good chance it doesn't make you as happy after a while.
If you're economically successful and happy, there's a good chance your passions and causes are less of a factor than they once were.
Yeah, I'm sure there's some guy out there who is sitting on his yacht full of joy about his Google stocks cash that he uses to feed stray cats or whatever but I'm talking about the rest of us.
This is particularly relevant to creative people. It's hard to just DO what you want when you also want to try to make a living at it.
If you want to be a economically successful artist (at least in the beginning) then you're probably going to have to be doing work on someone else's passions.
BUT. If you do what makes you happy and what relates to what you feel is the most important EVENTUALLY someone else will come along with some cash and say "hey! I also find this important and awesome! Take my money!" It's the side door to artistic success rather than coming up the front walk hoping that people feel your vibe.
Other people have different theories.
Some say don't get into a job involving something you love because it'll become corrupted and you'll end up hating it.
Some go with the "if you build it, they will come" plan. Risky, but I'm sure it works sometimes.
Some people find enough happiness in the non-passionate parts of life that they can make up for it.
Some simply just take the chance, do what they want, and if they make the money then it's great and if they don't then they're still happy.
It's not all about money though. People hold economic success at different levels of importance. It shouldn't be the same for anybody.
Income and/or affluence (lots of affluent people don't have normal "income" but have plenty of money) is problematic because it's wrapped around how society sees us, how we feel about ourselves, how healthy we are, how educated we are, how available we are, how free we are.
Think about how you react when someone cuts you off in traffic.
New BMW..."what a jerk!"
Junker rust bucket..."idiot!"
Soccer mom van..."pay attention!"
Same car as me..."grrr...oh look, same as me!"
There's so many layers here but I'll just tackle a couple. I'm also doing some grand generalizing. I know.
We see a nice car and assume the person in it doesn't really care about the rest of us.
We see a crappy car and assume the person in it is not too bright.
When we see a car similar to ours, or one we like, we want to form an alliance with them against all other dumb cars that are in our way.
We make assumptions based on this stuff all the time. It's lame but we do it.
There is a comfort level when things are similar to our realm of understanding. Somehow there is this expectation that others understand as we understand. There's also people who fall into the opposite belief that nobody understands them and nobody is like them. Neither of these is true or false. Isn't it a fun existence?
The point here is that if you are driven to create then you MUST create for yourself. If someone is paying you then it is not for you and you're not digging up what you really want to produce. Not at first.
If you want to make money, and you are attached to the creation part and not the outcome part, then give your skills to others and hopefully it equates to happiness. #Win
If someone sees enough of YOU and they see that sameness and understanding then they want to give you money to create for yourself because they understand that you represent them as well.
This is not to say that creating for yourself is always fun. It sucks. People feel like they can comment. On you. On what you created. People know that you don't go visit your friend with the new baby and say "oh wow...he's not going to be attractive." Nope. They cherish the spawn they have created and you appreciate that by not being a jerk for no reason.
Who do you know that likes every part of you? Not even your mama and daddy like every part of you. If you stood yourself in the corner of a gallery would someone come over and tell you that your pants are stupid? Probably not. They'll do it to art though. The art is the artist. The artist is the parent.
Basically...where do you get off saying what you like or don't like? You don't need to like it.
I don't like all your kids. Doesn't mean they aren't your most cherished creations that will hopefully be functional members of society who serve a purpose.
This relates to my life because I try to encourage my artist husband to do what makes him happy rather than what will be profitable. (Or at least I advise to separate the two.) He'd be pleased to make a living off of art. It's difficult. Not that he's known for taking the easy way in life but even so I try to sometimes make things easier in life when I can. If he was delighted to create a 9 foot tall sculpture out of soup cans in our yard, I'd say do it. Cans are pretty cheap.
People feel completely ok telling him if they don't like his art. My desire to make life easier for him in that situation is to start that person on fire. But that would make everything worse so I don't.
I don't know if people have the idea that he won't care because he looks like a badass or what. He cares but it's also part of the art package. Everyone is a critic. Don't even GET me started on the number of tattoo experts on the planet.
Why do we tell our kids that their unidentifiable creature on the fridge is amazing and tell adults that something they put their heart into isn't? Constructive critique is a different matter for an artist but I'm talking just regular random interaction here. We are both pretty harsh "modern art" critics but that's because it's not about the end result. It's about the PROCESS. Modern art is completely pointless unless you know who did it, in my opinion. If you don't know the meaning then you're just looking at nothing. It all has some hidden code or whatever. Once you know what the point is then maybe it's amazing. Maaaaybe it's still a swoosh and a dot but then at least you know why?
One moral of this I guess is: treat people like human beings regardless of how they look, specifically ones I'm married to or otherwise fond of, or I'll hate you and visualize you on fire.
I could say a whole bunch in relation to this stuff but it'd turn into a book and I have a meeting in a little while. Plus, there would probably be outrage and swearing and TMI.
In conclusion, if you don't love my husband and his art, that's ok. I know he'd paint in his own blood if he thought you'd appreciate it. I know how he feels about his art and how much he puts into it. He puts more effort into pleasing people with his work than I generally even consider doing. If that's not what's relevant to you then fuck off and watch out if you see me with marshmallows.
