2024 books

 I made an intention to read more in 2024. Usually, though, my intentions are temporary. It wasn't until I went back and looked at my Hoopla/Libby apps that I realized how many I got through. They were mostly audiobooks (reading with my eyeballs makes me fall asleep, audiobooks I can stay awake for longer), and I know I read other physical books but I'm not sure I remember them. So, mostly for me to be reminded later or for anyone that cares, here's a list: 

All 7 Harry Potter books. I do not approve of JK, but Harry is a comfort item that I needed and it was lovely. When you go back to HP, after all this time, you can REALLY pinpoint who JK hates. It's fascinating. I honestly don't know if she knows how much of her inner work-not-being-done is in these books but that's her issue to fix. 

I also read all the supplemental things. Tales of Beetle the Bard, Quidditch Through the Ages, and Fantastic Beasts. 

The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgsen Burnett. It was a favorite growing up and I thought it would be a good "falling asleep to" book because I'd read it so many times. HOWEVER, the flaw in my plan was that I hadn't read it in so long that I entirely forgot much of the book. I did imagine Colin Firth while reading it, which was fun. (He's in one of the movies.) 

The Ballad of Black Tom by Victor LaValle. This is a great little mystical book with primarily Black characters, which I was seeking because most fantasy/magical books are based on white experiences. There are many new ones out there though! Efforts are being made so make efforts to find them. 

Never Lie by Freida McFadden. This was...kinda fun. It's very basic and full of gendered ick but the mystery factor was entertaining enough to get through it. 

Legends and Lattes by Travis Baldree. Fantasy creature coffee romance. Adorbs. 

C.B. Strike books 1-5, by Robert Galbraith. (RG is JK, so I didn't want to enjoy them but I really like the stupid detective stories and the reader is really nice so they also became a comfort item. Also filled with traditional gender BS.) 1. The Cuckoo's Calling, 2. The Silkworm, 3. Career of Evil, 4. Lethal White, 5. Troubled Blood. Same commentary on JK. She's SO. WEIRD. About other people's bodies. 

Voyage of the Damned by Frances White. This one was silly and dramatic and odd. Magical creatures and their messed up caste system and murder and stuff. It was pretty funny I thought and they use inventive magical curse words. 

Tipping the Velvet by Sarah Waters. 1800's English lesbians and drag. Looong and so much drama. Obviously. 

The Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan. We watched the show earlier this year and it seemed to stick very close to the book. I saw the movie ages ago but never really got into Percy & Friends. The book was fun but since it was so close to the show there wasn't much to ponder so I might keep going with the series. 

A crap ton of Batman stuff. There's an audiobook version of the original movie, which is silly but fun. There's an audiobook called Batman: The Blind Cut and one called The Lazarus Syndrome. I've recently read a boat load of comics and that will continue. I'm currently working on one called Damned and I'm excited about it. It's DC Black Label, which means it's adult content. Constantine is in it, which is all I need to know. 

The Book of Doors by Gareth Brown. LOVED this one. It's about a magic book that can lead you through any door. (Very similar to Locke & Key--I've watched the show but it's also a comic. The show was great.) 

A good chunk of TJ Klune's everything. Started with The House in the Cerulean Sea. Read the book, listened to it twice. It is just as the review says, "like being wrapped in a big gay blanket." Read and listened to In the Lives of Puppets, which I really love. A-sexual romance but also puppets and robots and distopian stuff. Listened to Under the Whispering Door--cutesy about the afterlife, and The Bones Beneath My Skin--odd, gay romancey, kinda dark. 

As much as I LOVED The House in the Cerulean Sea, I think I might have actually enjoyed The Extraordinaries series the most. (Flash Fire and Heat Wave are #2 and 3.) Collectively, at least. It is 3 books versus one but the second Cerulean Sea one just came out. I didn't like The Extraordinaries right off the bat because it starts with fan fiction but it is so funny and the guy that reads it deserves an award for the array of voices. It's very gay, very cute, but has all the elements for a good superhero story. I've never enjoyed reading anything (like, at all) romantic until I read TJ Klune. He just makes it wonderful. 

I just finished the other day Carry On by Rainbow Rowell. If you enjoy Harry Potter but would like to not partake in that particular franchise any longer, or just want something new but similar, this is what you're looking for. It's essentially gay Harry Potter with characters swapped around. It's cute and fun and there's magic and drama and stuff. I just started the second one called Wayward Son (and not even because of the titles). It takes itself a little less serious than HP. I'm not sure why but it just does. 

I started many that I didn't finish because I no longer require myself to be bored for no reason. But it's possible I would have finished them if I was reading a physical copy. I'm not sure. I included some here in the list that weren't too bad but just didn't outrank whatever was waiting. 

American Magic- government drama with magic, pretty fun but got slow and I moved on. 
Stoneheart- dragon stuff. 
The Myths of Meritocracy by Malcolm Gladwell- excellent topic but non-fiction so I drift away. What I got through was great and I should finish it. 
Assistant to the Villain- village lass starts working for the known villain. Cute, got bored. 
What Grows in the Dark and What Lies in the Woods- kinda mysterious but literally don't remember which was which. 
Accidental Demons by Clare Edge. It's possible I finished this one and that I just don't remember how it ended. It was quite amusing. It's about a diabetic blood witch who keeps accidentally summoning demons because she has to draw her own blood every day. If I was a diabetic kid, I think I would have really enjoyed this. 

So, I guess I made a lot more progress than I thought I did! I'm quite happy about that. I should start keeping a list but I just checked by apps for these because I would have forgotten half of the titles. 

I read about half of Furiously Happy by Jenny Lawson. The beginning was like reading my own thoughts but the more she got into the details of her mental illness(es) it got a little too trauma-porn for me. She's super funny, if you can get through the other stuff. 

If you want any thoughts related to Batman comics, let me know! I might write something just Batman-centric later. We'll see. Anyway, I changed the blog title and thought I'd write something up as we all start reflecting on this *%&#*@ year. Hope to be back soon! 

Don't finish strong or start 2025 strong. Finish cozy and start slow. Show it we've learned our lessons.

2023: A Year for Love?

Something that was very present for me this year was the realization and understanding that I've had FAR more invisible barriers for my entire life than I ever considered possible. What I'm still working on is giving myself some god damn grace for it, as I would for anyone else. 

Along with my interactions with the world, learning more about myself, coming to understand bigger things better, I've made the discovery that LOVE is an intentional act. I'm talking about romantic, platonic, shallow, rooted, short-lived, eternal, all of it. I believe there are so many kinds of love that we collectively dismiss because it's not what Valentine's Day commercials show. 

If you're not actively loving, you're not quite there yet. And that's ok. I didn't realize it until I did. You can love in whatever way you want, but if you're giving it with no reservations, then I applaud you. And I don't mean, like, the "good vibes" or "thoughts and prayers" kind of love. That's care and kindness, which is lovely, but there's something more to it that I can't quite put into words. Maybe some day I'll be able to. The actions are the same, really, but there is something internal that needs to click for it to be genuine. I suppose it's simply the intention. If it's a habit then is it still intentional? I dunno. Maybe for some. Maybe over time it's the same? 

The world needs more kindness, which has to be rooted in love. Where else would it come from? Capitalism? No. That's cruel, inherently, by design. Individualism? That's what makes us all amazing, but love is collective. If we're not creating a system in which people are able to feel loved, then we're failing. Not only should we be able to survive, we should be able to thrive around barriers. We all know this, but we can't enact it without the puppeteers working on a large scale. Any of us can do one thing at a time, though, right?  

Don't get me wrong, not everyone earns or deserves your active love. But everyone deserves love. Everyone. The worst festering human turd on the planet deserves love. They're only a walking turd because they don't have love in the first place. That doesn't mean it has to come from you. Or me. Or anyone we know. The person to love that turd might not even know they exist, but maybe some day they will fall upon something resembling what they should have had before their turd status fully bloomed. Do not sacrifice yourself for love. Love and trust are the not the same. It's given freely, accepted by those who know it's value, and that's the end of it. Maybe it encourages others to decide to be active in love as well, but that choice is upon them. 

All the love in the world can't fix something that's broken, but it can perhaps give space for the tools that can fix things to find their way to the right places. Maybe love can smooth a road for someone. Maybe love can soften a hard landing. Maybe love can offer a realization. The fun and/or horrific part is that we have no idea how it'll go until it's already out there. We can't hold on to the outcome. It's up to us to give it, like releasing a balloon (please never release balloons, it kills animals) and never knowing where it'll land. 

So, what am I saying? A bunch of stuff that's very complex whittled down to a few words minutes away from a new year. There are a million different kinds of love and you choose which ones are the most important for you. Make it an action, especially if it involves living things, and release the need for reciprocity. That's what makes it joyful. I'm not saying you should give effort to those who dismiss or devalue you. Nope. That's giving them energy, that's different. Love can use energy but it's like a spout in Wonka's factory--a million dials for all manner of things. Some you always leave on, some you never use, some you're still not sure what to do with. Maybe you even need more, maybe you need to retire some. 

All I know for sure is that sometimes I feel like a real life Care Bear and if I can't burst into a rainbow, I don't even know what. It applies to people I love and care for regularly, it applies to people who have been awful to me, it applies to people living in the worse kind of fear imaginable, it applies to people living in the luxury only unethical wealth can provide, it applies to baby kitties on the internet. (It doesn't even mean I always LIKE them.) I want to shoot it out of my glowing tummy in all directions and hope beyond hope that it'll get where I want it to. It often won't. That's ok. I know it's out there. It's not wasted, I have more. You can have some. 

I wish I had better words to explain how I'm developing these thoughts but it's a work in progress, and I'm hoping to learn more so that I can speak on it with less chaos. Chaos Bear. 

I didn't watch it this holiday season but...to quote a movie that gets at some of what I'm saying; yes, even with all it's now problematic moments: 

'Love, actually, is all around." 

I hope you find all you need in 2024.