From my Kansas McGyver Mum I received my starter Survival Kit to go along with the book I got for Winter Solstice (aka "Christmas") called Apocalypse How: Turn the End Times into the Best of Times.
It's brilliant stuff. Here's an example of what it provides:
In the pages of this book, you will learn so much about how to prepare for, survive, and adapt after any worldwide calamity, you will actually start to look forward to it. Your attitude will shift from "Oh God, we're screwed!" to "Bring it on, Jesus/Terrorists/Telekenetic Snail People from Alpha Cantauri/Belgium!"
You have two options:
A- Get mired in negativity.
Oh Boo hoo hoo. I can't find my family, or my left arm.
Or
B- Choose to live by this simple but powerful credo.
When life gives you radioactive lemons, use a lead-shielded catapult to launch them at the foreigners attacking your compound.
Here is what my survival kit contains.
*55 Yards of silver Duck Tape- The 5th Force. Vital for Survival
*20 Yards of Purple Duck Tape- Just because it's the apocalypse doesn't mean you can't make a fashion statement.
*Bar of Vanilla Cream Prairie Sister Soap- For getting rid of Zombie Cooties.
*Survival Anklet- This can be quickly undone to give you ~8 ft. of line.
*All-Purpose Krazy Glue- For mending just about anything, including ax gashes.
*Pliers- A must have for life!
*Fancier Pliers type thing- These will make emergency door/window handles as well as hold parts on to the car.
*Emergency Blanket- Also works well as a shade to keep heat at bay.
Now I think I'll read through my handbook again and I'll feel quite prepared for the Belgians or whatever might bring about the end of times.
Happy Birthday to me!
Thanks mum!
