The madness within.

Night in Morroco @ Mataam Fez

2011-05-01T13:49:00.004-05:00

b'stella

FINALLY, after possibly years of planning, I made it to Mataam Fez in Denver with Olivia and Moody. It's a little hidden bit of Morocco sitting on Colfax. I would very much like to gut my apartment and make it look like the restaurant but I don't think my landlord would appreciate it. (Maybe he would, who knows.)
I of course love anywhere that I get to sit on the floor.
After they come rinse your hands with warm water, the first of the 5 courses of food starts coming out.

First course- lentil soup; I also got a drink called Marakesh, with rose something, red and plum wine. Pretty strong, pretty good, and just pretty.

Second course- potatoes with vinegar and other herbs and spices, spicy carrots, eggplant with garlic, spinach, tomatoes, hummus-like thing made from fava beans, and bread. Also, shredded carrots with raisins, apple and rose water. It was totally amazing.

Third course- b'stella, possibly my new favorite food. (Along with the carrots.) Flaky pastry dough filled with chicken, eggs, almonds, and spices; covered with powdered sugar and cinnamon. I could have eaten the whole thing, for breakfast, lunch, or dinner.

Fourth course- the main dishes; Olivia got the cous cous and vegis. Moody got his bunny in a spicy sauce. I tried it, it was pretty good. I got the honey and almond roasted cornish hen, topped with an apricot. Another one of the yummiest things I've ever eaten. Perfectly cooked and tender and the honey flavor is sweet and savory. The apricot was a nice treat.

Finally, the fifth course- After washing our hands again, and getting sprinkled with rose water, compliments of my friend Radouane, we had a plate of fresh fruit and warm mint green tea. If you've ever been you've likely seen them balance the glasses and pour in the steaming tea; Rad first balanced a cup on his arm and flipped it over without spilling, then he balanced one on his head and poured in the tea. The tea tastes surprisingly like a warm mojito...awesome.

Along with a little bellydancing and laughing it was a splendid evening, and once I've saved my pennies up again I'll definitely have to go back. My brain is full of the flavors and I'm already craving b'stella and honey hen again.

I may have just had a brilliant idea.

2011-03-27T09:27:00.002-05:00

It only seems fitting that I should have 30 mini-events leading up to my 30th birthday on the 30th of July. I guess I should have started sooner.

I'll just have to be diligent. I think I can count mom's birthday Rockies game as one of mine. So that's 1.

Some people just bring out the Me in Me.

2011-03-25T00:13:00.004-05:00

I know you see me as I am meant to be seen because when I am with you I feel as I am meant to feel.

"I've never been to a cave."

2010-12-27T11:04:00.003-06:00

Well the Christmas hoopla is over. We're all a little poorer with a little more stuff.
We made the trip out to grandma's for all the food and merriment we could handle.
I got food, booze, jewelry, and Dean Martin. You can't say they don't know me.
I also ate enough peanut brittle, toffee, and cookies to really hurt myself.
Dina was accused of pushing grandma down the stairs and making her gimpy for the holidays but we suspect it could have been the boozy fudge. We may never know. But I told grandma maybe for once she'll be rested after Christmas since she was Queen of the Castle and we all got to wait on her to keep her from hobbling around.
Grandpa was a dishwashing mad man. Uncle Eddie was channeling Cousin Eddie and a flu-zombie-like Elmer Fudd but thankfully seemed to sauna himself healthy while we were there. The boys were racking up the kills on their Wii hunting games while the rest of us just goofed off and ate non-stop.
My highlight was playing Pictionary with Dina, Ben, Tanner, and Jordan. We played the girls vs the boys. One of the all play words was "intersection"...for which Jordan started to draw a football field. In his wee blonde head that word is very near "interception" and I was quite impressed that he thought he would be able to draw that. Dina had the word "count" and I wouldn't stop counting but I never got it right.
And it turns out nobody knows how to draw a pretzel. Go ahead, try it.........
See? You can't get it from your head to the paper.
My favorite one was "cave drawings" and I think I guessed that one when Dina was drawing but Jordan wasn't quite sure what they were. Ben asked him if he'd ever seen pictures of them or anything and Jordan said "I've never been to a cave."
Grandma also correctly guessed one though she wasn't looking OR playing. But I think our time had already run out anyway.
All in all a good time was had, there wasn't a snow flake in sight, and Heather welcomed a new baby in to the family in the wee hours of the day after Christmas.

Now I have preperations and tidying to do before the next party on New Year's Eve for a couple of January 1st birthdays. I've still got a post office run that didn't get accomplished before Christmas and a Johnson trip to make...I'm always stretching out the holidays. But for now, I'm gonna stay on my couch and watch some more Dean Martin before I even considering putting all this stuff away and taking a shower. I've got all day for that.

A work of art is the unique result of a unique temperament. ~Oscar Wilde

2010-12-05T02:01:00.003-06:00

The inspiration and and problem. Sorta.

In addition to the growing number of yarn crafts I enjoy, I also like to paint.

I don't paint people or places or....recognizable things, generally. I do outlines or alter things that already are to something I want them to be. Some day I might get to something that looks like something I want it to without it already being something else. You know? I'm trying to figure out how to draw people. It's not going awesomely but you can tell they are people. At least I don't have a shortage of things to practice I guess.

I thought I'd share the people who do the things that crawl in to my eyes and lay eggs in my brain making me want to make stuff that as of yet I'm not able to do. They make perfection, thus MY problem of not being able to achieve perfection. That's always my problem.

Frida Kahlo-

We have plenty in common and may have been great friends. Her paintings tell stories that would not be able to be told in words. She paints conflict; seeing as that's one of my strongest motivations, you can see why I like her so much.

Dante Gabriel Rossetti-

Rossetti is very simple. 1) He paints nearly all redheads. 2) Many of them look like transvestites. 3) He paints such deep and rich colors that his work looks like a gourmet meal.

Totally amazing.

Georgia O'Keefe-

Contrary to my beloved Bill, I don't paint like Georgia; and I prefer her other paintings to the floral genitals. This one specifically takes away all the clausterphobia and filth and movement of the city and makes me feel like I can float over the hills though the crisp air.

Now for the living geniuses!

Alejandro Gomez Oropeza-

I suppose technically I've known him my whole life...but from a distance. My mother has drawings that he did for her before I was born so his art has been around me for my entire life. As luck would have it, now that I'm a grown up and can appreciate these things more, he just happens to make the most awesome art in the whole world. And with all of my favorite colors. I could attempt to recreate my own version of a Frida or Georgia painting if I was feeling really optimistic, but not in a lifetime could I make something anywhere near as amazing as Ale could paint in his sleep. He paints dreams.

http://www.gomez-oropeza.mx/

Kris Kuksi-

His drawings and paintings are flawless and amazing, but his sculptures are something to be worshiped. If Ale paints dreams, Kris sculpts nightmares. (If you know me well enough you know those are equal compliments.) His sculptures are controlled and meticulous mayhem. These I have seen in person, when I lived in Hays, and if you ever get the chance to see one GO DO IT. If you see them you'll realize how they can not be explained in words. They aren't necessarily negative, as one might think a nightmare would be, they are just unreal and in such silent frozen chaos. I literally can't even begin to think how he does these.

If you don't know who he is now, you will.

http://kuksi.com/

They must often change, who would be constant in happiness or wisdom. ~Confucius

2010-12-04T01:50:00.002-06:00

There are some things about me that will never change.
I am a female.
I was born July 30th, I'm a Leo.
I was born in 1981 so I am a Rooster, so say the Chinese.
I am not Chinese. I AM Scotch-Irish, German, Danish, & English.
I am a Johnson; even if something else was added I would always be a Johnson. It's the nature of us.
I will always have freckles, and be at least a little bit fat.
If I could have a super power I'd like to be able to speak any language.
Sawdust is a magnificent smell.

There are some things that are pretty concrete but could fade over time given the proper circumstances, though it currently seems unlikely.
Baseball is the greatest sport of all time.
Sandy was the best dog in the world.
I live for a good big or small screen story. Or a bad one, if it entertains then it was a success.
Creatures are awesome.
Sinatra is the most iconic of icons. I aspire to rebuild a Rat Pack.
I would kill for my best friends if it came to it.
I will never be satisfied with unpurposeful mediocrity.
I'm unnecessarily hygenic, at least when in the company of other humans.
I want to go. Anywhere.
I want a Belair.
I like the wind.
Harry Potter can not be out awesomed.
Proper grammer is generally preferable but can sometimes be worked around.

Some things are in fact the opposite of what they used to be.
I used to hate baseball. It interfered with other TV watching; that part is still sometimes true.
I hated wrestling until I watched it.
When I was young I thought onions and mustard were gross. Still waiting to flip on mushrooms but I don't see it happening. Fish isn't gonna happen, I think it's a phobia.
I used to not speak to people.
I like pink.
I used to wear short to walk several blocks to school in the snow. Now I have a hoodie nearby at most times and get grumpy when the Rocky Mountain chill arrives for longer than about a week or two.
I used to collect angels and can't for the life of me figure out why.

Moral of the story: This is why I don't have any tattoos. If I were ever to get one it would probably need to be somehow related to the first category. Why get something permanent for something that could change? I can't wait to talk to some of my friends about their interesting decisions when they are old and realize how foolish they once were. I'm glad to know what is unchanging and accept that things that I THINK will never change could absolutely change at any moment.

Just take a look at an old yearbook and see who you drew hearts around and you'll know exactly what I'm talking about.

Holiday Music and Gift Alternatives

2010-11-22T22:30:00.004-06:00

Take note of the date. Everybody knew it was coming.
Christmas is in 32 days and, in case anyone forgets, it is in fact a one day holiday. (I will allow the inclusion of Christmas Eve, if we must. So, 2 day holiday.)
I heard Christmas music in a store, likely Walmart, weeks ago.
Why do the stores do this absurd musical practice in early November? Because it makes you buy things. I think we all get a little caught up in things and November becomes a very sneaky month. But then you're in Walmart...and what's that....Santa Claus is Coming to Town? Is he?? Already? But it's still 75 degrees outside! Must. Buy. Presents. Now.
It has nothing to do with holiday spirit of any sort so don't you dare let them fool you in to believing in that nonsense.

Of course there are all the other issues that come along with this:
-Christmas is a commercial holiday that makes many a Scrooge filthy stinking rich.
-People spend beyond their means out of a sense of obligation.
-Those that are not Christian technically aren't celebrating "CHRISTmas." Keep the Christ in Christmas...I agree. Santa is related to him how? Cousins? I don't know. If you are a Christian please read up and see if you can't celebrate the holiday as it should be celebrated, in honor of that guy you like. I'm not anti-Christmas, I just don't celebrate that particular holiday. Send me any wish you like, just don't assume you'll necessarily get the same wish back.

Don't buy your 9 year old an Xbox, please. Instead, why not take them shopping for a food basket for families who are not able to provide as well for themselves in this time of distress.
Show them that once a year maybe it's ok to use a pencil and paper to write their grandparents a letter, what more would they ever ask for?
Find a book about how other people in the world celebrate their equally important and relevant holidays.
If it's possible to disgust your so-called Lord and Savior, I'm pretty sure Christmas is the way to do so.
I like presents as well as the next chick; I do give gifts to celebrate solstice because I enjoy finding things for my friends and family and it's a convenient time to do so, but I don't need the calendar to know when I want to give someone something. I actually had to go look up what day Christmas is on. I can never remember.
-Do you know of a time of year where people are more stressed out for a longer period of time for completely avoidable reasons? Neither do I.

However...
It sometimes reminds people that there's more love in the world than there seems. Even with all the greed, commercialization, violence, poverty, distrust, dishonesty, politics, hatefulness, and everything else that's wrong with this country and this world, there are great acts of kindness that appear around Christmas.

****I strongly encourage you to encourage your family to adopt this version of holiday gift giving.
***Find an organization which you feel is important (and preferably reputable) and, instead of buying a THING from China to give to your loved ones, give a much needed donation in their name.
***Find a local organization, Humane Society, shelter, etc. They often have a wishlist on their website of things they are constantly in need of. Fill a box and drop it off.
***Every year I adopt a soldier (from A Soldier's Wish List organization) and instead of buying presents for the majority of my family I go out and fill a Flat-rate box to a dangerously full level and send it off, usually to Iraq. They give you suggestions of things to send the the soldier you are assigned usually has a short list of things they'd like.
***Check out Heifer and Oxfam. If you donate a goat, get a little goat toy to send along with your donation card.
***Gift+donation, buy jewelry and crafts from organizations that are teaching (usually) women a skill.
***For the little ones it's harder not to get "real" presents (I still give gifts to my cousins) but perhaps in addition to a gift take them to choose a card off of the tree in the mall of wherever yours may be and have them help pick out a toy for the kids who might not get anything else. Kids usually like shopping for toys even if they are giving them away. I recieved gifts because of that when I was a kid. I remember getting a Sebastian toy...the lobster from the Little Mermaid.

Yes I will still give gifts to certain friends and my mommy and a handful of people who I really like buying stuff for and this season simply gives me an excuse, but please consider alternatives when going out to spend your hard earned money. If nothing else, take the logical approach...would you rather use your money on something that will become trash or something that will make a difference to someone. Seems easy to figure out. Gift giving is about being thoughtful, and though some people give much needed, desired, and cherished gifts, people will also appreciate you putting some thought in to what might be important to them and donating to it. And if they aren't, well, they don't really deserve your time and presents anyway do they?

My original intention was to explain why I, the heathonish non-Christmasy person that I am, love Christmas music. (Generally the classics, and sometimes a nice pop rendition of something.) I've been known to listen to Christmas music for weeks in August.
I just figured it out today...
It's because I know all the words.

Life is a Pie

2010-11-20T00:19:00.002-06:00

I thought of this while watching the clock not move at my desk of doom in the building of death...

Life is a pie. Here is why...(Maybe I should have made all of this rhyme.)

In your life you have a pan. A pan is solid, holds everything else together, and can withstand the heat. The pan is your family (whether biological or chosen), your values, your beliefs, your base, life's structure. Right and wrong, dark and light, left and right. The pan is more absolute than the other elements of the pie might be.

In your life you have crust. Crust is crumbly, flakey, sometimes your favorite part, sometimes not even necessary, it surrounds you but without the pan it doesn't hold anything together. It could be warm, it could be cold, it could be graham cracker, it could be pastry, it could have those little ridges and criss-crossy bits, or none at all.
The crust is your fun times, your party friends who come and go, your misadventures, your youthful foolishness, your flings and fails. These things maybe you shouldn't have done in the first place and would definitely do again.

In your life you have filling. Filling is what MAKES the pie. You choose what kind you want and you dump it in there. The filling is what you find to make life the best it can be, with flavor. It's your soulmates, your joys, your talents, your gleeful obsessions, your memories, your friends and loves.

Some of the things you'd find in the KJ pie of life would be...snuggling my dog (yes she's dead, but the past is still relevant to the filling), baseball, scary movies, chats with my cousins about why I'm not married and why grammar is important, playing with kittens, living with my roommates, being able to see the sky, my favorite books, all the nonsensical quotes in my head, artists I admire, my birthday parties, my sisterly chats with Katie, my brilliant idea chats with Lindsay, stuffing my face with my favorite treats, shopping for crap no one needs, shopping for crap for people I don't know, songs that will always be stuck in my head, foreigners, projects I never think are good enough, finishing my dishes, watching Letterman while grandpa Harold sleeps through it, peanut butter toast that tastes magical only if made in grandma Doris's kitchen, convertible rides with grandma Jessie, telling jokes with grandpa Tom, singing and dancing to Animal House with Taush, wearing feathers for any reason, shopping with mom, and large sections of Frank Sinatra...just to give you a small sample of the filling I have in the pie so far.

There's a lot of room left. Don't grab a fork just yet.

First birthday present of the season!

2010-06-27T11:37:00.004-05:00

Yay! Ok so it was a bit early but I got it on solstice so it worked nicely.
From my Kansas McGyver Mum I received my starter Survival Kit to go along with the book I got for Winter Solstice (aka "Christmas") called Apocalypse How: Turn the End Times into the Best of Times.
It's brilliant stuff. Here's an example of what it provides:
In the pages of this book, you will learn so much about how to prepare for, survive, and adapt after any worldwide calamity, you will actually start to look forward to it. Your attitude will shift from "Oh God, we're screwed!" to "Bring it on, Jesus/Terrorists/Telekenetic Snail People from Alpha Cantauri/Belgium!"

You have two options:
A- Get mired in negativity.
Oh Boo hoo hoo. I can't find my family, or my left arm.
Or
B- Choose to live by this simple but powerful credo.
When life gives you radioactive lemons, use a lead-shielded catapult to launch them at the foreigners attacking your compound.

Here is what my survival kit contains.

*55 Yards of silver Duck Tape- The 5th Force. Vital for Survival
*20 Yards of Purple Duck Tape- Just because it's the apocalypse doesn't mean you can't make a fashion statement.
*Bar of Vanilla Cream Prairie Sister Soap- For getting rid of Zombie Cooties.
*Survival Anklet- This can be quickly undone to give you ~8 ft. of line.
*All-Purpose Krazy Glue- For mending just about anything, including ax gashes.
*Pliers- A must have for life!
*Fancier Pliers type thing- These will make emergency door/window handles as well as hold parts on to the car.
*Emergency Blanket- Also works well as a shade to keep heat at bay.

Now I think I'll read through my handbook again and I'll feel quite prepared for the Belgians or whatever might bring about the end of times.

Happy Birthday to me!
Thanks mum!

My apartment is too cool for me to have to deal with such morons!

2010-05-24T19:18:00.003-05:00

But apparently the morons don't know that. Perhaps I should post a flyer or something.

There's a noisy neighbor. There's always a noisy neighbor. Occasionally people freak out completely (usually for good reason) and then create way more noise than noisy neighbor was making in the first place. It might make you feel better you silly wanker but it still wakes the rest of us up. I don't know why I can't just like by nice normal people or Mexicans that like to cook outdoors but whatever. Here's what I'm dealing with.

The 8-
There's me. I'm on the end. I have the best apartment other than the one on the end right across from me. He's on the neighborhood side and I'm on the 9th St. side so I get a little more traffic noise. But I like the traffic noise.

Crazy guy- Talks to his cat. Loud enough that I can hear it from my apartment. He looks like he's about 13 months pregnant (guy, not cat) and when it gets nice he's kind enough to show off his goods. He picks grass up with his ass and falling down pants aimed right at my big front windows and IF I'm lucky, he'll be doing some shirtless toe touches in the morning sun. With the cat. He seems....off. Like if he was a little twitchy I'd assume I was going to be shot in the night. But I think he's all smoked out of his mind so he's alright. He also has a spitting habit, which he'll display out in our common area so I can hear all the snot. I think he might be a painter of some sort because he has art all over his walls. He seems interesting enough, as do his giant-knife wielding pals, that I'm sure there's some sort of story there. I hope so at least. Otherwise he's just a freak.

Next to him is the Douchebag- About my age, seemingly no normal job, highschool students in and out all day every day. Parties every bloody night. Has no concept of "don't hang up posters at 2 in the morning or crazy guy will come punch you in the face." That happened. It was one of the more amusing yelling fights I've ever witnessed. No idea what this guy's deal is. He's not a total drugged out freak as far as you can tell by looking at him but what the hell is he doing??? Is he a drug dealer? Does he live off his parents? If so, why not live off them somewhere else? I don't think he's a student cause he just doesn't seem the type. I have no idea. I know he's a douchebag, that's all. There's a vampire theory as well but I've seen him out in daylight now a few times.

Next to Douchbag is Jeff- Jeff smokes and has messy hair. This is all I know.

On the end is some chick and possibly her boyfriend. They don't open the door, they don't open their windows, I see them park the car sometimes. No more is ever seen or heard of them.

On the end of my building is the older lady. She grills in the summer. She might be a groomer or something. There's a sign on her van but I can't remember what it says. She seems ok but I don't see much of her either.

The "nice" neighbors- The only ones I've ever spoken too past a single hello. Interesting folks, nice enough, socially strange perhaps but there's nothing wrong with that. They have a new cat. At least one is a geek and/or a nerd, I'm not sure about the chick though. She seems a little more hippy maybe. Hard to tell. Mr. Nice was the latest one to flip out at the Douchebag. I kinda thought he'd break down the door, which would have been bad but more interesting.

Between me and the Nices is mystery girl. I do prefer her to skinny bitch (wouldn't even attempt to say hello, closed her blinds at the slightest hint of social activity, and looked overall unpleasant) and the stomping children that woke me up every morning just before she moved away. I've never seen this new person. Not once. I see a car so I know someone is there. She's another one that never opens the door or the windows or anything. Do these people not need light or air or what?? So freakin creepy.

Anyway....I don't know why they all must be there not adding anything to my existence but they are. Cool apartments should come with cool people but this seems not to be the case.
I invited all the ones who were living there when I moved in to come to my housewarming party and no one came. So eff you all. The nice ones said they would have come but already had plans. Thus the reason they are the nice ones.

I hope everyone else has better luck with their neighbors but I know that's not really the case. I think my landlord screens people kinda like my bosses: Hmm...you don't have a shotgun in hand, a needle in your arm, or any color in your skin so you are welcome here.

Um...nothing really...

2010-04-28T20:41:00.003-05:00

My yummy salad for dinner was pretty satisfactory but I can smell people grilling and it's becoming a little less awesome. Oh well. Tomorrow I will stuff myself with IHOP and then I will be quite content. As most people know, anything IHOP makes me happy. Christina will be joining in on the fun and she's excited so that makes me more excited. It's nice to share the joy with new people who I find worthy.
I'm thinking I might go Belgian and get a waffle. We shall see. Some weeks I really put a lot of thought in to my Thursday outing. It's the highlight of my week. I might as well make the best of it right? But really....as long as the magnificent bringer of the food is there I don't care what else happens. He is why we can't go anywhere else. <3
I don't particularly have anything else terribly interesting to report because I'm all focused on my Thursday. But if something comes up then I'll report. Unless of course it's really good...then I won't. :) I'll update those who NEED to know.
Time for kettle corn and Demolition Man. I've seen it on TV in bits and pieces a dozen times but never seen it all. I love it.
Oh...I invented a new word- Technotasking. It's like multitasking but with technology. I can multitask with technology but I've taken it to a new level here.
I am currently watching an instant movie on Netflix on my computer and I'm blogging and Facebooking on mom's. I could have something else going on on another screen I'm sure but I don't have another one. If there was a baseball game on I could be doing that too. This is all I need right now I think. Whatever gets me to tomorrow.

I hope it thunders!

(Oops...technotasking gone awry!! My laptop just turned itself off. Like it does. Dammit! Am I not meant to watch Sly or what??)

My buddy

2010-04-03T17:06:00.003-05:00

Sometimes a cat's gotta do what a cat's gotta do.
Our good pal Malcolm has decided to venture off on his own...I suspect in search of Katie.
There was some waiting and some searching, and he might always come back to his nip supply in warmer days, but for now I believe Momgyver has accepted that he's found his way somewhere else. We just hope it's somewhere nice.
He was a good buddy. Things just won't be the same without the man of the house around.

The Wolfman, 2010 style...kinda.

2010-02-20T15:45:00.004-06:00

“Even a man who is pure of heart,
and says his prayers by night,
may become a wolf when the wolfbane blooms,
and the autumn moon is bright.”

No, Abbot and Costello were not in this one.
Just Benecio del Toro, Hugo Weaving, Anthony Hopkins, and Emilt Blunt.
Considering such a superb cast I think they could have done a little bit better but nonetheless it was still a fantastic film.

First of all I never would have picked Benecio out of thin air for the role of The Wolfman. Yet it was an excellent choice. He has a surprisingly similar presence to Lon Cheney Jr. that I never would have known. It's not so much that they look or sound the same; it's that they have the same sad eyes. This is essential for The Wolfman. It's not essential for a werewolf in general but it is for The Wolfman specifically.
The movie was very classic. The cinematography and art direction was superb. It really felt like it was created when it took place. They didn't over modernize. I think a modernized version would be neat as well but that's a whole different monster, literally.
If I may quote my own paper-- "Film werewolves are represented in three ways: the classic wolf man, the genuine wolf, and most cinematically friendly—the monster werewolf."
Examples of these are: The Wolfman (1941)as the classic, The Wolf (1994)as the genuine, and American Werewolf in London as the monster.
This new Benecio werewolf is the first incarnation I've seen of a combination classic and monster werewolf. It was a really brilliant way to keep it looking classic and believable (as far as monsters go) while making it more appealing and less ridiculous to the 2010 audience as opposed to the 1941 audience.
Yes, it's slow as some of the reviews have said but that's part of the charm. There is essentially nothing thrilling about Mr. Talbot....except when there's a full moon. That is the essence of what makes the story of The Wolfman a classic.
Any one of us can keep a monster within us, no matter how pure at heart we are.

Life is "strange and offputting." Like Dracula says...

2010-02-20T11:30:00.002-06:00

Nobody will know what that means but nobody reads this anyway so not a problem.

My house is messy. And it's so full of stuff. Why do I have all this stuff? I must do something about it. Of course if I trade in my little orange couch for my friend's giant cushy couch then it'll be even more packed full in here. But cushy. Another round of purging is on my mental to do list. I still miss my shack.

Fact is, I will always miss my shack. I try to keep the thought, that life will never be like it was, contained in a little box in my brain. But my brain makes a crappy box and it doesn't work at all.
One of my thoughtful friends recently was concerned about me getting hurt in just your average life stuff. I explained that nothing I get myself in to will ever be as bad as the horrible torture of being parted from those whom you love more than life itself. Loving things more than life itself comes with quite a disadvantage when you're not with them. As I said to Lindsay, one of my most beloved, we are a broken family and we always will be. But, life goes on even if there's not much of a point to it. With that in mind at all times I attempt normalcy...for ME anyway.
KJ normal is not regular normal but that's the only thing I have available that I can willingly embrace and enjoy. In the meantime I just find things that amuse me. Friends, movies, boys, booze, whatever. Not really good enough but...good enough.

I also wait for summer. Sun. Warm.
I've never had such a hatred for the cold yuckyness. I don't know what is different about this year but I'm about ready to pack up and get out. (I'm almost always ready for that but this is more specific.)

Strange and interesting complications give me a reason to keep tuning in for my next episode. Unfortunately they are a bit too interesting to be blogged about but feel free to find me for a private chat. :)

If I do something that seems questionable, that means it's worth the risk. This is something that SO many people have yet to learn of me. Soak it up. Please.

Junk and Stuff

2010-02-07T18:25:00.002-06:00

I told Sheena that I couldn't remember what I was going to blog about and "junk and stuff" was her suggestion so that works for me.

Here's a list of things that I've thought about writing about and haven't gotten to yet:

~I wrote about my first dream of 2010 but I was going to write about my first scary/apocalyptic dream of 2010. The end of the world apparently happens at my place of employment. Based on my feelings about that place it's not all that surprising. There was bodies hanging from the ceiling and chunks of ice flying over the horizon on to the building. It was pretty wicked crazy. I only wish I could film it.

~Things we liked better "Before":
Tiger Woods before the trashy women.
PeeWee before the wanking.
Michael Jackson before the...whiteness and strange relationships with children.
Olsen Twins before puberty.
Arnold before the politics.
Britney before K-Fed and the mental breakdown.
Lindsay Lohan before the trashy phase, when she still had freckles.
Christian Bale before the tantrum.
Television before Reality.
I'm sure there's more but that's all I have on the list so far.

~As a follow up to things we liked before is things we didn't like UNTIL:
Bob Saget until his disturbing appearance in The Aristocrats.
Chuck Norris until...what? Chin jokes? I don't know what happened there but I'm glad it went away.
Mickey Roark until The Wrestler. I liked Mickey but he wasn't getting the respect he deserved until then.
Charlie Sheen until Two and a Half Men. *See Mickey Roark explanation.
Hugh Grant until the prostitute? Should this go in the other catagory? I'm thinking not.
I didn't have as much time to develop this list but feel free to add to it.

~With the assistance of Ed I will hopefully come up with a list of words that should have opposites:
disgruntled vs gruntled: "My job makes me feel fulfilled and gruntled."
disturbed vs turbed: "I'm totally relaxed and turbed."
disgusting/disgusted vs gusting/gusted: "That was a gusting meal you prepared Yvonne."
Get it?

I had a nice day on Friday. I met a geek. All is somewhat more normal in the world.

That's about all I've got for now.

First dream of 2010

2010-01-01T10:38:00.004-06:00

I don't really remember what was going on before this happened....something equally weird.
I was wandering around this lovely little town with a friend who OH YEAH was randomly killing people. (I did not even watch Dexter last night, this was just lingering serial killer stuff in my head I guess.)
Somewhere in there he lined up a whole group of dudes because he did not want them around anymore I guess. There are three I remember in the group: Keanu Reeves, Hal Sparks, and David Spade. I didn't notice Hal at first I was just freaking out because of David Spade. I was talking to him and I said "He can't kill you! Tommy Boy is way better than Speed! You can have Keanu but you can't have Spade!!" Then I grabbed David Spade and wouldn't let go of him, which is when I saw Hal. I was like COME ON killer friend! This is not cool! Then he had them all lined up and I was still spazzing out and there were pictures of the necklaces they all happened to be wearing. They all had some sort of lightning bolt thing on in the picture. David wasn't wearing his anymore and Hal apparently was wearing a different one. Mr. Killer guy said that those two could go because their jewelry meant trust and friendship instead of whatever gang sign the other thing was. I squeezed my buddies and we went away from the killing line to a hardware store where my mother was buying some sugary cereal. David and Hal gave me their phone numbers so we could keep in touch (Spader apparently lives in Colorado in my head because he gave me a 303 number. I asked him how he could like in Colorado and I didn't know.)

And I am remembering now that the dream before that I was shopping for something at the John Elway car place on I-25. Wasn't a car though. No idea.

I don't know what the moral of the story is but I guess I have no loyalties to Keanu and I really love David Spade more than I thought I did. I kept hugging him saying that they couldn't kill him if I was attached... Hmm...He's in Vegas at the Venetian tonight. Just another sign that I should be there instead of here.
I'm just gonna take this as a good omen, watch Emperor's New Groove, and see what 2010 is going to do to me.

The End is Nigh.

2009-10-17T13:23:00.002-05:00

I’ve just decided that in the event of a zombie/vampire plague outbreak thing I should like to go live in Coors Field. It seems like a very reasonable place to go if such a thing happens. It is very fort like if you think about it.
There are big gates to keep the creatures out. Even if they do get past the gates I imagine they would have trouble with the turnstiles. Even high functioning people have problems with those. There are lots of places to hide underground. Assuming this happens during baseball season you’d be set for life with nachos and beer. If you can keep a generator running you’d never run out of Rockie Dogs. I’m thinking I’d put up some sort of “I’m not undead” flag or something at the top. Just in case someone flew over and didn’t know I was lounging out in centerfield.
There would be plenty of room for any other not undead people if anyone remembers that that’s where I’ll be.

I’m currently watching the original Last Man on Earth with Vincent Price. I love him. Last night I watched the original House on Haunted Hill, also with Vincent Price. He’s just one of the coolest people ever to live. House on Haunted Hill was interesting in comparison with the new one. It was actually much creepier than I thought it would be but much less gross than the new one. No surprise there. There’s one giant difference between the two which I thought was interesting but I don’t want to ruin it for people that haven’t seen them.
I’m making my way through my birthday present from Katie, the Collector’s Edition Horror Movie Classics in the screaming box. It’s an awesome collection. We’ve got Horror Hotel with Christopher Lee—I’ve seen it before, House on Haunted Hill, The Last Man on Earth, Night of the Living Dead, Dementia 13—I actually had this one on a different DVD and watched it the other day, crappy quality but not too bad. I’m glad I have this one though, it’s probably less fuzzy, Nightmare Castle, The Terror—this one I had on another DVD also, but again the quality sucked. It stars Boris Karloff and a very young Jack Nicholson, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde which I saw my last semester at Ft. Hays, The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari—this one is a silent film that I saw a few years ago. It’s surprisingly interesting. Last but not least is Nosferatu. I’ve been meaning to see Nosferatu for years now since it’s one of the earliest vampire movies.

For the moment, I move on to Night of the Living Dead. It’s been a while since I’ve seen it. I’d enjoy it more if it was gloomy but the stupid sun is shining right in my big windows so oh well. At least my mood is already gloomy if that helps at all.

Another one for Audra.

2009-08-15T18:39:00.006-05:00

What is your current obsession? Getting rid of all of my belongings and getting to another country.

What do you hate the most that everybody else seems to love? Macs. They are devil machines and will kill us all.

What are you wearing today? Since I FINALLY took a shower...a white skirt and a turquoise shirt.

What's for dinner? I'm going to go get something fried even if it does kill me.

What would you eat for your last meal? Hotdogs. I really think it would be hotdogs.

What's the last thing you bought? Spiffy new couch.

What are you listening to right now? The traffic on 9th.

What do you think of the person that tagged you? You know... she's my chair cushion.

If you could have a house, fully paid for, and totally furnished anywhere in the world, where would it be? I have no idea. Maybe on a non-hurricaney beach somewhere.

What is one of your hobbies? Movies. Watching. Discussing. Critiquing.

What are 3 things that annoy you most? 1.ignorance 2. intolerance 3. people with no sense of humor

What is your favorite color? Lime green has been making more of an appearance lately. Always like the magenta pinkys and anything else super bright.

What is your favorite piece of clothing in your wardrobe? my newish green, white, and black splatter shirt. It's so cool.

What is your dream job? Getting paid to watch movies or talk to people.

Describe your personal style. I do not have a personal style. That would require consistency.

What are you going to do after this? Think I'm gonna brush my teeth and go to Sonic.

What is your favorite "happy hour" at Sonic? Not a clue. But...what a coincidence eh?

What inspires you? Stories. And hating my job.

Who was the last person you kissed? Javier

What are you currently reading? Just finished "Mother Tongue" and I think I might start Huckleberry Finn.

What delighted you most today? Watching Bride and Prejudice and dancing around to Lata when it was over.

By what criteria do you judge a person? By how they interact with strangers. That's how you see what they want others to see.

The rules: 1. Respond and rework; answer the questions on your blog, replace one question you dislike with a question of your invention, add one more question of your own.

I don't like the Sonic question but....wait I have one...

If you could suddenly be the best at any given talent, what would it be?
You know, I didn't expect my own answer but I think it would be writing. If I was the best writer ever I could do just about anything. And then write about it.

Kansas...Hays, Kansas.

2009-07-24T16:36:00.002-05:00

I have returned to the plains. And what glorious plains they are.
At this moment it is 100* and thankfully only 23% humidity.
I am currently lounging with my gato Malcolm at the house of McGyver. It's lovely and he's happily purring away, happy that at least one of his women is attending to his needs.
Today, Katie and I went to The Mall and had Mall chinese food (best ever) and got our nails done. Katie got a sensible reddish color and my claws are now the neon-est of neon greens. It's fabulous!
Yesterday I had to send Lindsay back home to Kansas City so she could hop a plane to the other home, Boston. We only got one whole day together but we know how to make the best of a day. On Tuesday we had Guiterrez...I had a strawberry colada, which is a surprising favorite of mine. That night we did our usual. We ate even more food, drank more booze, and watched movies. Eric came to join us and remind us why there is only one Eric in the world. He can relate any movie credits to Big Bird, a foreign phrase of some sort, or some other kind of complete BS that he has made up. He starts stories in the middle and never seems to notice we're making fun of him until we point it out. Everyone should have an Eric.
The next morning Lindsay and I enjoyed a Days Inn continental breakfast and I went for a swim. As we were just about to leave the pool three noisy, bouncy little he-gremlins came galloping in with their pop and he mentioned something about destroying the peace and quiet. I told him that I had gotten my fill of it and then we debated with the boys about whether or not there were fish in the pool. (There were. They were painted on the side...but the argument is fun to make with small boys.---It's not REAL! I'm touching it!)
Our most important plan for the day was to go see Harry Potter. We were successful. It was amazing. Just like it was the first time. Just like it will be the third time. We also enjoyed superb Chinese and wandered The Mall...even venturing in to a couple of the pre-teen whore stores.
We revisited another old favorite hang out-- Walmart, where I bought a new camera. Happy birthday me.
There was a semi-History Club gathering at Gellas, which was also as magnificent as ever. We were joined by Dr. Goodlett, Eric, and Jarrod. (Katie was absent from ALL of this because she was off getting a job in Indy. Uncool but we dealt with it.) Dr. Goodlett (aka- Uncle Dave) was impressed by our fine speech and motor skills after a certain amount of alcohol. I'm not sure if he was disappointed or not... Then back to the Days Inn with the boys for more movies, snacks, and booze. I just can't think of anything better. The accomodations could be better, the refreshments could be better, there could be additional company, but the general idea is about as good as it gets. We watched The Lair of the White Worm. I HIGHLY recommend it for nights of boozing and snacking.
On Thursday we made time for a quick trip to campus to pick up Sheena Beena for lunch at Gutch's; stopped by to say hello to Dr. Cummins as well, always a joy.
Then Lindsay was away to the east. Before she left in the van-beast we chatted about our future Hays plans, which consist of buying a house and coming here for months at a time.
Tonight's plans are also an old standard. Larks baseball and evening drinks. Another of those things on the list of stuff that can't truly be improved upon. I hope to see more of the folks that are still left here to be seen and I hope the Larks keep up their momentum and WIN tonight!

Until then, I shall remain here with gato. He is bearing his belly for me...purring and waiting.

Long time, no blog.

2009-05-16T15:04:00.003-05:00

I know no one cares but I feel like I should be here more often.
My big day has come and gone. I now have 4 less teeth jabbing me in the brain. On Thursday I got 3 wisdom teeth and a broken tooth pulled. It was a horrifying prospect but I barely even noticed they were digging around in there. I saw Dr. Johnson for all of about 1 minute. Still not sure if he was even there for any of it or not.
I'm recovering and it's going very well. I had virtually no face swelling and I only took my percocet as a precaution. I haven't had any fun trippy times with all my drugs, which is a bit disappointing but they don't seem to have much effect on me anyway. Oh well. It was a possible perk but I will soon be mostly pain free so that'll do instead.
I'm still getting used to the holes in my mouth and am starting to get pretty hungry. Some of my girls took me out yesterday for biscuits and gravy. It was good but not nearly as good as grandma's gravy. I've been quite happy with mashed taters and jello so far. Taco Bell isn't too much farther down the list. Must have something with flavor!
Mom and J are off galavanting so I'm here taking care of the creatures and they will NOT leave me alone. Lola stays at my feet and Stowie stays on me in any possible position, or just curls up in my arm pit. I think they put a spell on me to make me sleep more just so they can sit on me for hours at a time. They are both curled up here as we speak. Lola is probably getting bored but she goes out to protect us from squirrels on occassion. Stowie is in a ball, purring up a storm.

As for the face, it's pretty good. Still can feel it a bit but it's just so nice that they aren't there any more. I'm resting while I can and remembering to take my pills. I think they are making my skin numb but that's a whole different thing perhaps.

I have a new apartment update coming I suppose but I'm not ready for that yet. I'll try to get some pictures soon for those interested!

Not something a kid should have to worry about...

2009-03-31T22:40:00.001-05:00

My little buddy Karam wrote this and I wanted to share because it's awesome.

My motherland, My Nation, Iraq
2008

5 year's have passed from that day
On her great soil did they lay,
Crimson fires, destruction and death
as I sat there holding my breath.
How can this be? Why God? Why?
My brothers and sisters look up to the sky,
To see bright explosions , but it was no Fourth of July.
Ten deaths today, a thousand tomorrow
Hail to the Chief who feels no sorrow.
It's come to Blood for oil
Spilled on the desert soil
in the cradle of civilization
My motherland, my nation
Will I ever see the land of my men?
Not until they leave.
Only then.

They pull the trigger, another death from a bomb
Is Iraq Arabic for Vietnam?

Friday the 13th...before I forget.

2009-02-17T23:26:00.002-06:00

Frankly it wasn't anything overly memorable but there were high points.

I saw the new Friday the 13th on Valentine's Day. Just how I like my V-day. Bloody.

As always is the case, the movie was inferior to the newest Halloween but there were good things.

Jason was actually pretty scary! I haven't seen them all but he's often more pitiful than scary. You can't see his face but it's almost like you can feel the desperation coming out of him. This time he was bigger, badder, and much more Michael-like. Jason's always been a little more emotional than Michael. Michael is mechanical, Jason is a messed up momma's boy.

With that said, all the prey was more retarded than ever before with a couple exceptions. They are all stupid kids that deserve to die for the most part. There's a few that have remotely redeeming qualities, the "funny" guy is almost charming, and...yeah it's best just to wait until they die. The worst character gets the best moment though so that's something.

Overall it's not too bad, but it's sad that this is the best we seem to be able to do. Tolerable characters can die too Mr. Bay! It might make it better if we care if one or two die.

If nothing else, Jason was an improvement over what I've seen in the past so I was pleased.

Somebody had a birthday and I was there.

2009-02-17T20:45:00.008-06:00

My wee little sister is now my wee grown-up sister. Technically. I went to Kansas last week to celebrate her 21st birthday. It's always exciting to visit Hays but this was more stupendous of course. There was much birthday hoopla. We FINALLY played Trivial Pursuit. We all got drunk and there was dancing. I still am not walking properly but I'd do it all again right this very second if I could.

I added some crazy decor to Katie's room while she was at work, and the tiara made the rounds on party night. There are more incriminating pictures for those curious.

Malcolm was getting in the party mood. There were things dangling from the ceiling and everything!!

Those wild librarians. They can party it up I tell ya.

HUG HUG HUG!! DRUNKEN HUG! And the dancing began.
I've got the little boys in Kansas but these are my bigger boys, Jarrod and Eric. Also weird, but taller than the gremlins.

Still standing after all that dancing and drinking.

I barely got a chance to make it out to see the little ones but I did get there for a little while. Jordan's birthday is coming up to so I took birthday present to him. It's a crazy marble get-up. You put it together and the marbles swirl around and it's pretty cool. Tanner was interested until we got it put together and Jordan was otherwise occupied until we were done putting it together. It's just the way they work. And always in their underwear.

The birthday boy has been getting some loot out of the tooth fairy as well as you can see. He looks a little like Frankenstein's monster here for some reason...like if there was a baby monster. There should be.
Overall, the trip was magnificent and I'm going to write more about my friends because it physically hurts me to leave them. I needed more time. I always need more time.

The Rules of Kansas

2009-02-01T16:38:00.002-06:00

I got this at work one day when I was feeling grumpy. It cheered me right up!
This sums up all that is great and frightening about Kansas .
Fort Hays didn’t make me love god but they tried their best.

Rules of KANSAS
1. Pull your droopy pants up. You look like an idiot.
2. Let's get this straight; it's called a 'gravel road.' No matter how slow you drive, you're going to get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.
3. They are cattle. That's what they smell like to you. They smell like money to us. Get over it. Don't like it? I-70 goes east and west, and Hwy 75 goes north and south, and the Kansas Turnpike goes cattywonka. Pick one.
4. So you have a $60,000 car. We're impressed. We have $250,000 combines that are driven only 3 weeks a year.
5. So every person in every pickup waves. It's called being friendly. Try to understand the concept.
6. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of ducks are coming in, we WILL shoot it out of your hand. You better hope you don't have it up to your ear at the time.
7. Yeah, we eat KANSAS BEEF & corn on the cob. You really want sushi & caviar? It's available at the corner bait shop.
8. The 'Opener' refers to the first day of deer season. It's a religious holiday held the closest Saturday to the first of December.
9. We open doors for women. That is applied to all women, regardless of age.
10. No, there's no 'vegetarian special' on the menu. Order steak. Or you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham & turkey.
11. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats, vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup.
12. You bring 'coke' into my house, it better be brown, wet, and served over ice. You bring 'Mary Jane' into my house, she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.
13. K-State and KU College and high school basketball is as important here as the Lakers and the Knicks, and a dang site more fun to watch.
14. Yeah, we have golf courses. But don't hit the water hazards -- it spooks the fish.
15. Colleges? Try K-State or, KU, Fort Hays or Emporia State or Washburn. They come outta there with an education plus a love for God and country, and they still wave at passing pickups when they come for the holidays.
16. We have lots of folks in the Army, Navy, Air Force, and Marines, so don't Mess with Kansas. If you do, you will get whipped by the best.

Ah, good old midwestern folk. :)

The Book

2009-01-27T21:49:00.002-06:00

I have finally updated The Book on my webpage!
Philip has been harassing me to do so for months and whatever Phil wants, Phil gets.
There's quite a lot of nonsense there so don't get lost.
Enjoy!

Go to my webpage and look for The Book button on the left, or just go here:
http://www.geocities.com/kathayj/TheBook.html

GLAAD: Thank Campbell's for LGBT-Inclusive Ads!

2009-01-06T21:00:00.002-06:00

I hadn't seen this before, but I think it's really awesome! I think it's important to tell them that we (those like-minded individuals) are happy to see their support of LGBT families. It's a nice change to say thank you to someone so I suggest you do! And stock up on the soup while you're at it!

The original link: http://www.glaad.org/2008/Eblasts/campbells_blast.html

Dear Friends,While GLAAD has been hard at work fighting defamation against our community in media this year, anti-gay activists continue to put time and money into targeting media that show our lives and community in a fair and accurate way. This month, the anti-gay American Family Association showed their “holiday spirit” by demanding their constituents respond to a LGBT-inclusive advertising campaign released by the Campbell Soup Company.The ads for Swanson broth ran in the national LBGT news magazine The Advocate. The campaign, entitled “Home for the Holidays,” features a lesbian couple with their son and lists Swanson broth as a key element in the family’s annual Feast of the Seven Fishes Christmas Eve celebration. The ad was met with an alert from the AFA that called for e-mails and phone calls attacking the Campbell Soup Company, which owns Swanson’s, for acknowledging that gay people “constitute a family and are worthy of support.”

Check out our post on glaadBLOG for a copy of the ad and resulting media coverage: http://glaadblog.org/2008/12/23/afa-shows-their-holiday-spirit-with-attack-on-ad-with-lesbian-moms/.

We cannot let anti-gay forces intimidate our allies and block possitive images of our community. We commend Campbell’s for being inclusive of all families and ask that you too thank them for being fair and inclusive of our lives by e-mailing Campbell Soup President Douglas Conant and Director of Corporate Communications Anthony Sanzio. Follow up with a phone call to the Campbell Soup Company and Swanson and let them know you appreciate their support for LGBT families.

Douglas Conant, President douglas_r_conant@campbellsoup.com

Anthony Sanzio, Dir. of Corporate Communications anthony_sanzio@campbellsoup.com

Campbell Soup Company 1-800-257-8443

Swanson1-800-442-7684

As we enter 2009, anti-gay forces continue to try and silence our community and make us invisible. We must tell our stories, ensure that media is inclusive of our community, and remind people of the common ground that we all share now more than ever. GLAAD’s media advocacy and anti-defamation work is so vital and your support is so necessary. Our organization exists because of generosity of people like you and we need your support now more than ever at this critical time in the movement.

PLEASE DON'T STOP GIVING. End the year by telling Campbell’s their ads are “mmm mmm good” and help GLAAD fight anti-gay defamation and promote LGBT-inclusive media.

On behalf of GLAAD, thank you for your support.

Your role in our alliance strengthens us and renews our hope for 2009.

In service,

Neil Giuliano

Media Advocacy.

Fighting Defamation.

Changing Hearts & Minds.

Visit www.glaad.org to learn more.

A little momento from home.

2009-01-04T14:30:00.004-06:00

Destination USA: Volga Heritage

http://www.travelchannel.com/Video_%26_Photos/Video_Detail?videoRef=TITLE1317

I don't think I posted this before. I can't figure out how to get the video to my blog so you'll just have to go take a look.
My boss, my other mom, and one of my favorite hangout places are all there. :)

May they burn in hell for their crimes...

2008-12-22T21:22:00.002-06:00

Lesbian's brutal gang rape investigated in Calif.
By LISA LEFF, Associated Press Writer Lisa Leff, Associated Press Writer
SAN FRANCISCO – A woman in the San Francisco Bay area was jumped by four men, taunted for being a lesbian, repeatedly raped and left naked outside an abandoned apartment building, authorities said Monday.
Detectives say the 28-year-old victim was attacked Dec. 13 after she got out of her car, which bore a rainbow gay pride sticker. The men, who ranged from their late teens to their 30s, made comments indicating they knew her sexual orientation, said Richmond police Lt. Mark Gagan.
"It just pushes it beyond fathomable," he said. "The level of trauma — physical and emotional — this victim has suffered is extreme."
Authorities are characterizing the attack as a hate crime but declined to reveal why they think the woman was singled out because of her sexual orientation. Gagan would say only that the victim lived openly with a female partner and had a rainbow flag sticker on her car.
The 45-minute attack began when one of the men approached the woman as she crossed the street, struck her with a blunt object, ordered her to disrobe and sexually assaulted her on the spot with the help of the other men.
When the group saw another person approaching, they forced the victim back into her car and took her to a burned-out apartment building, where she was raped again inside and outside the vehicle. The assailants took her wallet and drove off in her car. Officers found the car abandoned two days later.
The woman sought help from a nearby resident, and she was examined at a hospital. Although the victim said she did not know her attackers, detectives hope someone in the community knows them. One of the men went by the nickname "Blue" and another was called "Pato," according to authorities.
Richmond police are offering a $10,000 award for information leading to the arrest of the attackers.
Gay rights advocates note that hate crimes based on sexual orientation have increased nationwide as of late. There were 1,415 such crimes in 2006 and 1,460 in 2007, both times making up about 16 percent of the total, according to the FBI.
Avy Skolnik, a coordinator with the New York-based National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs, noted that gay, lesbian and transgender crime victims may be more reluctant than heterosexual victims to contact police.
"Assailants target LGBT people of all gender identities with sexual assault," he said. "Such targeting is one of the most cruel, dehumanizing and violent forms of hate violence that our communities experience."
Skolnik said the group plans to analyze hate crime data to see whether fluctuations may be related to the gay marriage bans that appeared on ballots this year in California, Arizona and Florida.
"Anytime there is an anti-LGBT initiative, we tend to see spikes both in the numbers and the severity of attacks," he said. "People feel this extra entitlement to act out their prejudice."

The most important thing we can take from this, since we have a luxury of not being the victim, is that when anti-LGBT laws are passed-- "People feel this extra entitlement to act out their prejudice."

UNACCEPTABLE!!!

Majel Barrett Roddenberry 1932-2008

2008-12-18T23:59:00.004-06:00

She was literally a piece of American pop culture history.
So fabulous.

What have you done today to make you feel proud?

2008-12-03T22:21:00.004-06:00

It's from a song. Love it.

In September I volunteered to help out at the marriage booth for the Boulder Pride Block Party!
It was a lovely day and we had so much fun. The event was in the middle of Pearl St. and the marriage booth was conveniently located in front of the courthouse. I volunteered as a Rent-a-Bride and helped The Funky Reverend perform illegal weddings. We informed people of rights they still would not have as a same-sex or illegally married couple. We had about the same turnout of both couples. No one wanted to rent me though. Boohoo. My theory is that they knew I wasn't gay. I mean, who wants to marry a straight girl? Not me! I looked super though so whatever.
It's a good day when you can spend it with great people doing something that you really care about.

Quinn rented himself out to marry Nuclia Waste on stage. It was a beautiful event.

There's me on the left.

These guys were something... I don't know if the honeymoon is still on. They'd only been together for a couple days.

And these guys were so cute. They have been together for 6 years.

I've been slacking--Here's an overview.

2008-12-03T21:40:00.005-06:00

There's all sorts of stuff I haven't been blogging about. None of it all that life changing but, you know....
Way back in July, after I moved back to Longmont, we went to Tausha's wedding in Wyoming.

That was a fun family event.

For the July 4th weekend we had yet another family gathering. Almost everybody came and took over mom's house and we had lots of food, wet children, and baseball. The boy got to go to their first major league baseball game. I'm not sure they really knew what to do with everything. They've never been anywhere that big before and with so many people. Jordan found the secret to homeruns apparently.

I got to go to a couple more games over the summer with Ed. Awesome as always.

Katie came to visit in August. We hung out in Boulder, and took a trip up to Estes. I've been gone too long and she's a Kansas native so we didn't make it all the way up to Trail Ridge. I couldn't breathe by the time we got to the Stanley. (Which by the way, charges $5 to just get up and look at the bloody hotel! I DO NOT recommend it anymore!) Most of it's spook and charm has vanished. It's too bad.

We had a fantastic time as always. Katie drove her all by herself in mum's brand new car. It was very exciting. She brought some fabulous gluten free bread that we all hogged down. There was an incident with pepper...but that's really to be expected.

I started my new job in September. The day before I had the worst tooth ache in the history of teeth. It made my first day sooo much fun. But things are good now. I'm liking the job for the most part. It's a perfect job for now, I have a super fun team, and I can wear jeans. What more could I really ask for other than a few more dollars? My first week was quite the week. We had the big all employee event with food and festivities and whatnot. I won't go into all the cool stuff but we have a PSA-ish video that might be coming out soon. Danny Glover was in it. Pretty awesome. And another cool thing that my company is doing is building a clinic in Nepal. They brought Jugat to visit us from the village near the clinic. He was very cute and kept calling us his "honorable friends." They have a lot of fun guest speakers with very cool stories.
One guy came in to talk about the Last Ocean, which is somewhere north...like all the way north. It's the last bit of ocean on the planet that isn't destroyed beyond repair. He has some amazingly cool pictures that I hope to be able to show you some day. My favorite speaker so far was a guy named JR Martinez. He was in Iraq when his humvee ran over a landmine. He was in a heavily armed vehicle so the area was evacuated before anyone even knew he was still in the burning car. He has burns over 40% of his body and has had dozens of surgeries. Now he uses his experience to help others and the guy practically glows. The way he talks to a big group of people makes you feel like you've known him for years. We got to chat with him a bit before he left. He's the nicest guy and so adorable. I think about him almost every day. Exciting news for him! He's going to be on All My Children! He told us that the day before he came he had an audition and I saw a video online on Veterans Day that he got the part! I definitely recommend checking him out on this video-- http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=6193326&page=1 More to come.....

For Audra

2008-11-22T16:46:00.002-06:00

8 Things
8 Television shows I watch....
The Simpsons
Family Guy
American Dad
Clean House
Star Trek
Ghost Hunters
King of the Hill
Um....more Family Guy

8 Favorite Restaurants....
Old Chicagos
Good Times
IHOP
Olive Garden
The Other Side (even though it doesn't exist anymore)
Gutch's
Taste of India
Ruby's...also gone.

8 Books I've read recently....
Frankenstein
Dracula
Me Talk Pretty One Day
Naked
Fight Club
The Bartemaeus Trilogy #1
The Mouse and the Motorcycle
Started...Empress

8 Things that happened yesterday....
Went to Boulder
Saw James Bond
Ate Mexican food
Drank some strong margaritas
Saw my friends
Did the usual at work
Was late for work
Got lots of hugs

8 Things I am looking forward to....
Being able to eat on the right side of my mouth
Going to Kansas for Christmas
Going to Kansas for Katie's birthday
The end of my class
MOVING
Star Trek movie
Friday the 13th movie
Next pay check

8 Things I wish for....
Barrels of cash
To see my friends
To make some new friends
To figure out who the prince is
Good hot dogs
Teeth that don't hurt
Somewhere nice to live
To write an awesome horror film

8 People I'm tagging...
You're it.

2008-09-13T19:11:00.001-05:00

I think there's a typo. I'm pretty sure his last name is Schmuck.

"This is nature meets the proud United States of America, and my US of A is going to win."ROBERT SHUMAKE, of Galveston, Tex., on the approach of Hurricane Ike.

What a moron.

Jimmy Kimmel about Sarah Palin

2008-09-07T20:22:00.003-05:00

"She looks like one of those women in the Van Halen videos who takes off her glasses, shakes out her hair, and then all of the sudden, she's in high heels and a bikini."

And my proposed bumper sticker:

Say what you will about Hillary, but at least Chelsea never got knocked up.

KJ and the Duck Heads. Or, a few last days in Hays

2008-08-03T17:38:00.006-05:00

Rise and shine, after a night of not sleeping in Tanner's room, for breakfast at IHOP. We all stuffed ourselves with pancakes before the long drive back to Colorado. I was going to see Dina and the boys the next weekend so it wasn't a long goodbye. But I was left to send off Katie and Judy with lots of hugs since I wasn't sure when I'd see them again.

The last night at Joe's. By the end of the evening the crowd had mostly slimmed down to the Joe's crew and the History Club crew. My usual. A fitting end.

Everyone got ducks before I left. Naturally, what does one do with a duck but put it on one's head.

This was our Scrabble game frosted in hillarity. I don't even remember why but it was quite fun. Jarrod was really getting into the spirit of things. Threats were hurled as was ice cream, but that mostly came from Martha's delivery system I think.

The Larkettes! We didn't get a 7th inning sing-along but I think we won. Maybe not.

Just a few more pictures....

2008-07-03T15:35:00.003-05:00

It was something that looked like Spaghetti O's.

Kendra and her little Buckethead.

Me and my girls, Amanda and Tausha. Love 'em.

The "Family Reunion"

2008-07-03T14:53:00.006-05:00

Luckily the party went better than the planning might have indicated. The grandparents kinda forgot to invite half of the family, and it was horrible timing as far as my summer goes. We had a good time though, and some of us got to see people we haven't seen in a long time or meet people we've never met.

Mom and Dina discussing important things.
So there's some southwest/Texas/Mexican thing about hanging bags of water from the trees to keep the flies away. Yeah, well, where there are Hunsicker boys and bags of water in trees there will soon be water everywhere else. Tanner was trying to pop it over my head but I moved so they had to make do with just making a mess. As you can see, grandpa was of no help. As usual.
We had enough food to feed a couple small countries, and it was all super tasty.
We played some volleyball until we realized that the ball was really hard and it really hurt. We also tried badminton. The younger ones need a little longer to get the hand-eye coordination down and us older gals need to not play in the dark. It was extremely funny at the time though.
The highlight of the weekend was of course the world's cutest freakin baby. This is Emma Jean. She's a music fan. She's working on her bongo skills.
Like I said, cutest thing ever.
Emma and Geneva, grandpa's sister. We used to chat on messenger sometimes so we knew each other but I had never met her so that was pretty nice. I was going to hide in her ginormous camper and run away with them but I decided against it. They had room though. We'll have to plan a visit to whichever Carolina they live in one of these days.
Grandpa and Clinton working on the homemade ice cream. It's clearly man's work.
I like to call this one "Beauty and the Beasts." Makes her look even cuter doesn't it?
Jordan and Flaming Marshmallows. Sounds like a band name, and relatively dangerous. We didn't do too bad. Only a few flaming ones.
Amanda and Les probably giving each other a hard time. It's apparently the natural way for people to pick on Amanda and the other way around. She was the yougest for quite a few years. We can't start to pick on Tanner and Jordan until they get a little bit bigger and won't cry.
Saying our goodbyes to great-grandma and Aunt Linda.

I got to sleep in a tent and therefore probably slept better than I would have inside so I had a good time. I didn't have to go homicidal on my family due to lack of sleep. There were a ton more people there but I have an excess of pictures of the child. They were there, we had fun. That's good enough. I was happy to see my girls, Taush, Amanda, and Emma. I don't get to see them very often. Too bad Eathon wasn't there, but we all got to talk to him on the phone. He just graduated from some paratrooper something or other. Well done to him. He's moving on to bigger and better explosives now. It's a match made in heaven. If anybody wants to see more pictures, let me know. I have some more. And if you have any EMAIL THEM!!

Long Beach Finale

2008-07-01T00:56:00.003-05:00

Just a bit from the end of my trip.
We tried another Dirtbag's game and it was much less soggy than the first. We kicked butt and got a spot in the College World Series. I believe they promptly fell back out but they got there.

We gave the kids a bath one day. I don't remember when. We made pillows too, but that was a few days before. I don't remember if I mentioned it. It was a task to find the Joanne store. There is this phantom moving road in Long Beach that just will not allow you to get to the store.
Anyway, Wilson got grumpy and stuck his face in the corner. But he was so soft when we were done.

We went to Signal Hill/Peak/something and that was pretty cool. You can see all of Long Beach, some of the islands and beaches, and L.A. There were little educational signs and after all the rain and such we had some very nice not-so-smoggy views.

We went to the Queen Mary, which is probably the coolest boat ever. I haven't been on that many boats I guess, but this one is cool. It's one of the most haunted places and it doesn't give you much reason to doubt. Right next to it is the Russian Scorpion submarine. It's awesome just from the outside. I'd love to go back and see the inside.

The smokestacks were the best part. Well aside from the anchor. And the ghost stories. I just think they are awesome. They are freakin gigantic. If you click in the informative sign it will tell you how big they are.

My last evening there we went back to Shoreline Village, my favorite place. We did some shopping, listened to a band that was there promoting itself, and ate too many fried bread products. It was so fantastic. Then we went to have pizza with Katie and company. We went to an awesome candy store, the most awesome ever. They had Mars bars and everything that exists in the world of candy. We went to Pinkberry which is a strange little place but pretty neat. It has frozen yogurt but it is more like yogurt that is cold rather than the frozen yogurt that is pretty much ice cream. You can get fruit or nuts, and even Fruity Pebbles mixed in. I was full of pizza at the time so I just tasted Audra's but you know I would have had to get the Fruity Pebbles. After that we went to The Beach store so I could get some Long Beach State souvenirs. Who doesn't want a Dirtbags t-shirt? I know I did.

This is finally the end of my Long Beach ramblings. No one else is likely to care that much but I like to think about what I did while I was there. It was one of my favorite vacations. Audra cooked for me, I got to meet Wilson, I was chaufered around L.A., and got awesome seats at a Dodger's game. As far as California goes, you can't get much better than that in my opinion.

George Carlin 1937-2008

2008-06-23T00:32:00.003-05:00

Shit Piss Fuck Cunt Cocksucker Motherfucker Tits.

He never had a routine about words you can't blog.

George was the first person to host SNL. I did not know that until now.

Long Beach: Episode 3

2008-06-20T14:16:00.005-05:00

Dodgers Game-- Dodgers vs. Cardinals. Aside from seeing Audra and meeting the family, this is what I was most excited about.

I'm pretty sure the Cardinals won 4-0.

Before the game we went to a Mexican place, met Audra's friends Kelly and Kevin, and ate chips and salsa while we were waiting for the bar to open. It was just across the street. I THINK it's called the Short Stop. They have cheap beer when there's home games. I didn't drink beer, I drank rum and Coke, naturally. My friends kept a glass in my hand. It was very nice of them. John and I chatted about British shows. What more can a girl ask for?

I remember there was a nickle in the toilet in the ladies room. There was some discussion on how to get it out of there and what would be the least gross way to do so and if it would be worth it. Raul is a pioneer for all abandoned coins.

After my rum and Coke I needed an Irish Car Bomb so I got Kevin and the bartender to join me and it was a beautiful moment. Audra didn't have faith. She didn't think I could do it. We've been apart too long. After the booze we wandered our way up a gigantic (at the time) hill to Dodger's stadium.

Once there we found the photo people. From what I remember it went something like this--

Lady: Do you want to take a picture?

Raul: Uuhh...

Lady: It'll be fun.

Raul: OK!

Then there was running so I just followed and jumped into the green screen shot. It's one of those things where they stick you in the middle of the field. Technology is great. And the pictures turned out great. They are a complete rip-off at $25 for a few pictures but they were too fantastic for me to pass up. It's my favorite momento from the trip. The boys look nuts and Audra looks saucy. I'm just sort of there.

This isn't it, but aren't they all so cute?

Our seats were fantastic. The whole thing was great fun. There was a funny drunk lady and we ate Kettle Corn. I didn't enthusiastically cheer for the Dodgers. I was already wearing a Dodgers shirt, I can only go so far into enemy territory. But I got to see good old Juan Pierre again. He used to be a Rockie. He's Juanderful....

Now I own a shirt I can only wear during the winter. But it was worth it to get into the spirit. I tried to Think Blue but it was kinda purpley.

I love this joke every time.

2008-06-18T14:42:00.000-05:00

Penguins Go to the Zoo

A man drives to a gas station and has his tank filled up. The gas pumper spots two penguins sitting in the back seat of the car.
He asks the driver, "What's up with the penguins in the back seat?"
The man in the car says "I found them. I asked myself what to do with them, but I haven't had a clue."
The clerk ponders a bit then says, "You should take them to the zoo."
"Hey, that's a good idea," says the man in the car and drives away.
The next day the man with the car is back at the same gas station. The clerk sees the penguins are still in the back seat of the car.
"Hey, they're still here! I thought you were going to take them to the zoo."
"Oh, I did," says the driver, "And we had a swell time. Today I am taking them to the beach."

Long Beach: Episode 2

2008-06-16T23:42:00.005-05:00

Saturday was L.A./Dodgers Day- We went to pick up Raul's pal John somewhere in or near L.A. which is not quite an hour away(?) So, just as we pull up to get John, Raul says to Audra something along the lines of "I assume you have the Dodgers tickets." Guess it's probably something we should have checked before we left the house rather than when we get an hour away... Audra didn't have the tickets but she bought them online so we were hoping to be able to retrieve them through her email. So we were on a quest for a Kinkos, and in the mean time my tour guides (John and Raul) drove around L.A. pointing out things that might be interesting. We went to In & Out for burgers, which were fabulous. Best burgers next to Good Times. Unfortunately neither of which you can get most places. We did find a Kinkos and print out of Dodgers tickets. All was well. It was funny.

We saw a few Scientology compounds. One was specifically for celebrities and it said so on the sign. It was very much like a fort. We saw the sidewalk stars. It's less impressive when you realize the stars are everywhere, like in front of a Bed, Bath, and Beyond. But it's still cool. There was the Guinness Records place, Ripley's Believe It Or Not, the Wax Museum, Kodak Theatre, Chinese Theatre, an abundance of tattoo parlors and shops of a questionable nature. We just did the drive through tour and in a few places that was more than sufficient. In addition to all the cinematic and world record fun, we saw: a guy peeing, a guy possibly having seizures in the street, a variety of drug addicts/dealers, and I assume a few good old fashioned L.A. prostitutes. But they were on a different street. John pointed out several places where they shot this movie and that movie. I don't remember most of them though. We also saw tons of really awesome houses. They might be crammed in there, but they are very cool. And of course we went to the Hollywood sign. There was the rock throwing entertainment, which you can read more about on Audra's blog. We climbed around on a hill, took some pictures of the sign and then went on our way. Then it was off to prepare for the Dodgers game!

Long Beach: Episode 1

2008-06-13T12:29:00.004-05:00

Arrival, May 22nd: As I was leaving Denver, while we were driving to the airport we were more or less surrounded by tornadoes. I saw a small one in a field, which really makes one feel confident when boarding a smallish plane. The flight out was not all that pleasant. I went from Denver to Salt Lake to Long Beach. Flying in to Long Beach was not overly pleasant either. California was not its usual sunny self.
Audra and Raul came and picked me up from the tiny Long Beach airport and there were hugs a plenty and all was well. I was on the ground and with my best girl. We went to Shoreline Village (which, as it turns out, was my favorite place) and after a quick stop at a Pirate store, we ate at the Yardhouse. It has a massive list of beer on tap, some kind of world record or something. And the food is fabulous. We got to eat out on the patio even though it was apparently FREEZING by California standards. It's kind of worth it if you get to watch the sun set over the ocean.
After dinner we went home and I got to meet my nephew for the first time--

This is Wilson. Oh he's my little buddy. Look at the face. He's so squishy and cuddly. He's a little bit "special" but I love him more to make up for it. He's a good fella and we became friends quickly.

Wilson's keeper is Sugar. She's a big lady with a tail that could injure a small child. If she had a pinky her papa Raul would be wrapped tightly around it. She's a lot of fun, good with the tug of war and can chew things to impossibly tiny bits in record time.
That evening we ate ice cream and tried to watch Indiana Jones but like the party animals that we are, we pretty much all fell asleep about half way through.

On day 2, I remember waking up and watching the (early) morning news about all the California tornadoes that were flying around. Again, just about as I was flying in. No wonder the flights sucked! Mother nature was in a mood. Later that day we went to see the Long Beach Dirtbags play...someone, Fullerton maybe? Yes, Dirtbags is the actual name. I have a shirt to prove it. I discovered while I was there that Troy Tulowitzki is a former Dirtbag. I had no idea. Audra and I met her friend Katie and Katie's lovely sister, whose name I can't remember. Katie, embracing the California weather was wearing a puffy North Face coat. There was chippys everywhere in giant coats and hats and gloves and scarves. It was amusing. I don't remember now if the Dirtbags won or not. They were in it for the College World Series playoffs so it was a big deal. We left early though...

First there was a mist...then sprinkling, then rain, then more rain. My knees were very damp. We decided to move up a bit and attempt to wait out the 30 minute rain delay. However...when we moved up, we were just under the awning where not only the rain could still reach us but the excess water was flowing off the roof right to our seats. The row behind us was totally dry.
With all the fun we could stand and wet pants we decided to head home and dry off. There were raging curb rivers to cross and Audra being the hurdler among us fared pretty well. I accepted my wet footed fate. My pants were falling down because they were so full of rain. But, naturally the entire situation was hillarious to me and I didn't mind all that much.
It probably would have been disappointing and surprising if I had an absolutely normal trip to California. That would be so unlike us.
More to come....

For more stories, visit Audra's blog-
http://audrasmith.blogspot.com/2008/05/miss-locks-and-lots-of-rain.html
http://audrasmith.blogspot.com/2008/05/lots-of-little-things-for-big-weekend.html

Beginning of summer- part 1

2008-06-07T15:05:00.002-05:00

We'll just start with the end of school and go from there. I'm no longer a full-time Tiger. School is out, and I hope I never have to do anything else that takes so long. I could go on a rant about what a rip-off and a waste of time it is, but I'll restrain myself. The important thing is that I am done. I thought I'd put up some pictures from the party. Judy and Katie hosted a party for me and Sister Alice. I graduated with a BGS, Alice is now a master of theology I believe.

The grads- I made hats for us since neither of us did the silly ceremony.

My guest list included- (aside from Alice, Katie, and Judy) Eric, Skyla, Jarrod, Sharla Hutchison, Lexey Bartlett, Dr. Goodlett (aka Uncle Dave) and Ana.

Jarrod wins for weirdest picture of the evening... I love it.

My buddy Ana. She did a wonderful job decorating my hat.

We ate hotdogs, we chatted, we ate more food, we laughed. I think everyone had a good time, but then I don't remember a time when we haven't.

Next up: Trip to Long Beach to visit Audra.

California did something right.

2008-05-16T16:48:00.003-05:00

That's pretty cool. I guess they don't do everything wrong but it's just a weird place.

I'll be there in a week to visit Audra, which is very exciting.

I'll just be missing Long Beach Pride though. I suspect this year will be even more spectacular since those who wish to do so can LEGALLY GET MARRIED!! Take that you homophobic fuckheads. It will surely add some festive feelings to the party.

Getting married is still a weird thing to do but not allowing people to make that disasterous decision on their own is against every god damn thing our country is supposed to be gung-ho about. Other states will soon follow and those that are against it can just sew their lips shut.

I love Kansas.

2008-05-09T00:48:00.005-05:00

Because I love my Kansas friends.

I'd like to say I wish I could take them all with me, but I kind of would rather bring civilization to them. Once you get over the lack of shopping and culture (other than German), it's just fine here. We have the best thunder storms. If it were not for the devil's humidity, I would love Kansas summers. As it is, I only love Kansas springs. But most importantly I have a superior posse, which I usually do.

I have the McGyvers-Judy and Katie. And our nights at Joe's with Alice and Martha.
And Sheena Beena! (Which includes the fellas, Phil and Damian.)
History Club Posse- Eric, Skyla, Daniel, Goodlett (and little Goodlett, AKA Ana.)
My pets- Stasya and Jarrod.
The scholarly types, not so much "pals", but people that I am very fond of- Amy C., Dr. Bartlett, Kim P., Sharla and Sweetpea, Dr. Duffy, Dr. Geo, and even Todd and Singleton.

It makes you consider that maybe there was more reason to set The Wizard of Oz in Kansas than just for a tornado. As creepy as it may be, the midwest is unique. The warm and friendly nature of many its inhabitants are lovely things to be surrounded by. Sure, there's no shortage of jackasses and morons, but that's life. At least out here it's not generally all that hip to make a habit of being pretentious and snobby. Uptight, yes, but not rude.

We had a good night.

Hopefully I'll have time to write more about them soon.

Another Iron Man Note...

2008-05-05T10:38:00.003-05:00

I forgot to mention this earlier...
One of the keys to Iron Man's success is this--leave the angst out of the story. Thank god. You know how in Spider-Man, the whole MJ thing is just annoying an whiney? Well in Iron Man the movie is about....ADULTS! It's amazing what a couple decades can do to un-lame a story.
Basically, there aren't any children in the movie. There are grown-ups. In this example, it leads to a more enjoyable story minus any dumbass love triangles or whining. It's sooo much better that way.
Just FYI.

Iron Man

2008-05-04T23:18:00.003-05:00

Who would have thought that Robert Downey Jr. would make a superior super hero? He's brilliant and completely perfect for the part. All the actors fit quite well for their intended purposes. I hope and assume we'll see more of them later.

I must say that I prefer Iron Man to Spidey at this point. (Katie is the Marvel expert, but I do believe this is the best of the bunch as of late.)

This was a fun movie to watch. I wish there would have been more of it. But, for those that are smart enough to STAY FOR THE CREDITS, this won't be the last we see of good old Iron Man. It looks to be a very exciting beginning of things to come. Now we can hope that they don't screw up the sequels.

New study: 58 percent of black children can't swim

2008-05-01T15:47:00.001-05:00

So that might be one of the weirdest headlines ever but I suppose it's true. It hadn't occurred to me to think about this.
However, the article has a valid point. That being, "Black children drown at a rate almost three times the overall rate." That's not good. Teach your kids to swim people. And a good percent of Hispanic children can't swim either. What happens if someone falls in a pool? Just hope there's some white folks to rescue them? That's not a good plan for any situation. We rarely save things, we generally make it worse. Anywho, it's just an odd statistic I guess. We're all just getting fatter, maybe the kids should be learning to swim for several reasons...

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080501/ap_on_re_us/swimming_blacks

Another epiphany...housekeeping?

2008-04-26T22:33:00.005-05:00

It's my second in a month. Not bad.
I am.....Tommy Girl. I also like the perfume, but that's a different matter entirely. The movie is a comedy classic. I guess I am a bit of a combination between Tommy and Richard, but you should see my point if you know me at all.
I'll provide quotes to prove it:
Tommy: Did you hear I finally graduated?
Richard Hayden: Yeah, and just a shade under a decade too, all right.
Tommy: You know a lot of people go to college for seven years.
Richard Hayden: I know, they're called doctors.

Tommy: I got a D+! I'm gonna graduate!

Tommy: You better pray to the god of skinny punks that this wind doesn't pick up, cos I'll come over there, and jam an oar up your ass!

Tommy: Does this suit make me look fat?
Richard Hayden: No, your face does.

And the best part of the whole movie-
Tommy: Forget it, I quit, I can't do this anymore, man. My head's about to explode. My whole life sucks! I don't know what I'm doing, I don't know where I'm going. My dad just died, we just killed Bambi, I'm out here getting my ass kicked and every time I drive down the road I wanna jerk the wheel into a Goddamn bridge abutment!

The Forbidden Kingdom

2008-04-26T10:48:00.003-05:00

The film isn't getting great reviews but that's greatly from the side of the critics from what I can tell. I, on the other hand, thought it was quite fun. I like Jackie Chan, he's funny and he can defy gravity. Jet Li isn't as entertaining as an actor but he's just as awesome with the kung fu moves. (Probably more awesome technically but I'm not an expert.) I read one review somewhere that said "Finally and Jet Li and Jackie Chan movie! But with someone else's story." Well, get over it. English is not high on the list of Jet's talents and really how much Jackie do we need to hear? I thought it was a perfect vehicle to get us to where we needed to be. Transitions are weak and yes the story is semi-ridiculous but since when have kung fu movies been about anything but the action? You don't go see a movie starring two of the greatest martial arts actors to get deep dialogue. You go to see what magic they can do.

As always, people have not yet learned to go watch a damn movie for what it is and not what they had in mind. If you think you can do better, then please go do so.

I recommend this if you want a lot of action but not a lot of violence. If you can figure out what that is. It's not too often that we get a whole lot of butt kicking with a minimum of blood. I believe that we can thank the Asians for that. The scenery is lovely as well. And I like the story, I don't care if it's predictable and goofy.

Killing things- The new art.

2008-04-17T10:39:00.003-05:00

When Dexter kills people, it is art. But he's on TV. Actually doing it is less artistic.

This is from the blog petitioning against his newest "creation". Apparently someone liked his first dead dog so much that they are going to allow him to do it again.

http://guillermohabacucvargas.blogspot.com/

Guillermo Habacuc Vargas admits on his new created MySpace page, that he indeed killed the dog!
Here is a part of his original [most recent] statement:"Hello everyone. My name is Guillermo Habacuc Vargas. I am 50 years old and an artist. Recently, I have been critisized for my work titled "Eres lo que lees", which features a dog named Nativity. The purpose of the work was not to cause any type of infliction on the poor, innocent creature, but rather to illustrate a point. In my home city of San Jose, Costa Rica, tens of thousands of stray dogs starve and die of illness each year in the streets and no one pays them a second thought.
Now, if you publicly display one of these starving creatures, such as the case with Nativity, it creates a backlash that brings out a big of hypocrisy in all of us. Nativity was a very sick creature and would have died in the streets anyway.

So, he's completely correct of course. Just look for it and you'll find people freaking out all over the place because he's killing things. But they aren't freaking out over the dog that's dead on the other side of the wall in the alley. *This is the problem.* People are only upset because it is being sensationalized. Otherwise would we pay attention to one dead dog in South America? Absolutely not.

On the other hand, I think this guy is a jackass and he should be tied up in the corner. If he was using humans I'd be ok with it but the dog has no choice in the matter. Doing something to make a point is useful but watching something die instead of helping is karmically problematic and cruel in general.

Is he making a point? Yes. Is it effective? Yes. Is it art? Not in the slightest. Art implies talent. This is not talent. All it proves is that he knows how to tie a knot. This should not be encouraged. He's made his point. Something died that he could have easily prevented, which I suppose is what we should all be thinking about.

Get your damn pets fixed!!

Front Page News (Only in Hays)

2008-04-12T13:07:00.003-05:00

This is our new hangout. I'm hoping it'll get some more regulars soon. But until then.....looky, I'm in the paper.

Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape!

2008-04-06T00:03:00.003-05:00

Charlton Heston 1924-2008

He was an interesting, and kinda nutty man who I really don't agree with in so many areas. However, his contribution to film is undeniable. He created memorable and unique characters for some of the greatest and grandest movies of all time.
Here's to Chuck.

6 Lessons for a Happier Life, from Christophe Andre

2008-03-20T22:50:00.002-05:00

1. Accept that there will be unpleasant things in life. All the time, every day, you'll face hinderances: You'll be too late or make a mistake or say something stupid. It's the rent you pay to live in the house of life. It's part of life. There's no point in being disappointed when things don't go your way.

2. Open your eyes and look around. There are more opportunities for happiness than you think, certainly for a Westerner in 2008. Embrace the moments. Try to remember them. Enjoy them.

3. Take time out. The ability to pause, mentally as well as in your actions, is important. Taking breaks is a prerequisite for experiencing happiness.

4. Pay attention to your family and friends. Social ties are important for happiness. Don't let a day go by without thinking of, or seeing, someone you love.

5. Try to get in touch with nature every day. Take a walk in the park and spend a few minutes looking at nature.

6. Express your gratitude and respect for the good things you experience. Being thankful makes you happy and increases the chance of social connection.

No Country For Old Men

2008-03-01T15:39:00.002-06:00

Dude. Wow. I assumed that, at the very least, Javier's nomination was well earned.

The man was born in, and came falling out of, a freakin' awesome tree.

There are a few things that make this movie so brilliant--for one, there is relatively little dialogue. And when they do talk, it's not drivel, it has meaning and then another layer of meaning. It's strangely humorous, but that's the Coen's for you.

I haven't seen too many of the other big nominated movies but I'm glad this was a Oscar success. It's a masterful piece of art. As far as the movies are concerned we're getting deeper and deeper into an abyss of fluff and nonsense. There's a place for that of course but some of us are thankful that there are still true artists out there. Well done and bravo. (And MAN is Javier a bastard, he's so...great!)

Oscar Night Part 2

2008-02-27T17:52:00.003-06:00

I covered my Oscar party, now I thought I would cover the actual Oscars.

Best dressed: Helen Mirren, hands down. She is the coolest lady ever for several reasons. (When I say "ever" I obviously mean, "aside from Dame Judy and Maggie.")

Worst dressed: Mrs. Day-Lewis. What the hell was that thing on the front?? And the bows? What is the matter with you woman?

Most exciting win: Tilda Swinton for best supporting actress. That's the only person I was really pulling for. I would have been very excited to see Johnny or Viggo win in their category but for one thing I wouldn't have been able to choose between them and I knew Daniel was going to win.

Best acceptance speech: Tilda Swinton, because she's funny and awesome. 2nd place goes to the little Irish chippy that thankfully got a second chance. Way to class it up Oscars.

Best musical performance: The winning song from Once was lovely, but I think that Raise Me Up was awesome. As I said to the gals, it takes gospel to get so many black folks at the Oscars.

Speaking of diversity, how about that French chick? I've been wondering if the leading actress award has ever gone to someone in a foreign language film before. It was a multicultural event and it was very excitng. Did anyone see Javier Bardem's mother? Does she looks like an awesome lady or what? She had all KINDS of silver on. I like her.

This year might have been the lowest rated but it was a great show. The obvious mistakes I think we're limited to 2. Neither Whoopi nor Steve Martin were given any time in the host montage. I know they had good moments. Also, the more obvious omission was Brad Renfro from the dearly departed list. He might not have left in a blaze of stardom but he was still somewhat of an icon and should have been included. The whole "we can't include everyone" line is a load of crap. Also, what's his name from Jaws was left out but should appear next year.

Oscar Night

2008-02-26T22:50:00.013-06:00

I was glad to have attended my first official Oscar party this year, and luckily it was a fairly good show. It was not a black-tie event at the McGyver house, but it was a fancy hat event complete with costume changes. We also wore special shoes. Due to a recent shoe incident with Judy, we all wore two different shoes. It took Judy about an hour to notice. But to be fair, she was distracted by Harrison Ford for part of that time.

Judy won the big bingo prize as well as the award for Best/Most Hats. Katie had the most dramatic/ridiculous costume change of the evening.

Malcolm tried for best supporting actor...and was unemotional over his loss.

I was the big winner of the evening, with 14 correct educated guesses on our Oscar ballot.

I won the Hays Movie Critics of America Annual Award, and a note pad from 1987 with a poopy baby on it. (It says "Oop. More poop." It's great.)

Let me explain by telling you what my official winning message was, presented to my by Sister Alice (aka : The Hays Movie Critics of America Annual Award Committee.)

Congratulaions winner!

Because you live in Hays, Kansas, where no Academy Award nominated films are ever shown, think can only mean one thing:

YOU'RE FULL OF IT!

We therefore hope you enjoy for the year 2008-2009 this traveling trophy especially designed to honor you and all those like you.

My acceptance speech should be below, we'll see how the technology works out. If you can't hear it I thank Entertainment Weekly, and it cut off before I thanked IMDB and my mom. AND you get to hear the Laugh of the Katie. It's not just a myth.

There's not a bad enough curse word to cover this.

2008-02-20T20:18:00.005-06:00

So basically this is the deal. The female ref couldn't officiate because it is the OFFICIAL POLICY of the school that women can't have any authority over men. Men must learn from men, and women must learn from women.
How I hope the school gets struck by lightning. I hope someone gets fired. I hope they change the rule. I hope there's at least SOME parent that's not a mentally unstable person, and that complains about this god damn rule of theirs.
They have a lot of work to do because now they have to fire ALL of the nuns who have been teaching boys. They obviously have to outlaw mothers in general because who has more authority than a mom? The ex-cop ref is gonna have to stay home, and while we're at it we better rid the world of female cops all together. They even give the women weapons! How can this be!!??
I bet the people who made this rule are god-loving good old fashioned red-blooded Americans....who would be fantastically at home in parts of the middle east where women aren't really allowed to do anything at all.
We should probably just stop educating females because they are just going to want to start reading and voting and feeding themselves.
I really don't understand how the world works. How can these people exist? If there WAS a god, they wouldn't. They are just messing up their own agenda.
I'll give somebody a dollar to go paint "Vaginas rule" on the gym floor. The school is called Saint Mary's for fuck sake!! What, was she a drag queen??? Sounds like a drag name to me.
Burn in hell you stupid stupid humans.

The Sisterhood of the Traveling Kath

2008-02-17T12:29:00.009-06:00

Valentine’s Day, having come and gone, makes you realize a couple of things. Specifically, that a corporate holiday is telling us when, how, and how much it costs to love someone; and that a great many people are very confused about “love.” I personally thank the gods that I don’t have to witness any direct male attempts to subdue my apparently uncontrollable feminine desires for chocolate, flowers, and jewelry.
I greatly prefer my realm of love—romanceless and authentic.
This leads me somehow to my point: I occasionally take stock of my assets. By assets, I don’t mean my cherished DVD collection or my irresistible charm. I mean things (people, in this case) that add value to my average existence.
Taking stock of one’s friends sounds kind of shallow at first, but it’s actually the opposite. I’m not sitting here laughing maniacally, basking in the glow of a million friends. I’m sitting here happily considering how lucky I am to have such nice people to fill the gaps that nice people are supposed to fill in life.
The specific group for this topic is: My Sisters. (Shown in order of appearance, more or less.)

My Old Lady/Twin Sister- Amy Louise

We spent many years, once upon a time, like an old silly married couple. With relocating and adolescence, we lost touch. We have recently re-touched and once we’re within a more reasonable visiting distance good times will be had. We have the balance between reminiscing (we met in 3rd or 4th grade), and pondering the present and future. Things are communicated via our ancient link and it’ll always be up and running. We have seen each other a grand total of 1 time in the last 7 or 8 years. But it’s as if we never lost a day. She’s someone else’s Old Lady now officially, but I was still there first.

My Past-Life Big Sister- Jane #1

(There’s more than one, so she gets a number. The Amy’s have them as well.) For Jane and I to have been actual siblings, there would have been some real funky genetic engineering and experimentation going on. She’s much nearer my grandparent’s age bracket than mine. But ask me if that has ever mattered. She’s been with me since high school and I can just about guarantee that she always will be whether it’s on this plain of existence or another. Time with Jane is always well spent, period. There are no variables there. We could be cleaning the sewers with a toothbrush and we would have a splendid time because every day I spend with Jane is a day I wouldn’t have traded for anything. I recommend that everyone have a Jane of their own, it’s like having a personal Yoda minus the pointy ears and the funny grammar.

My Brown Sister- Danielle (Homie)

Neighbors, to roommates, to family. She’s the kind of friend that everyone wishes they had. She takes care of you without being parental. She’s generous and giving when you don’t even know you need it. She’s there when you need her. She’s like a big waterfall of comfort. She’ll also laugh at your jokes. She makes the people around her feel special, and you can’t really ask for more than that from anyone. People have heard the phrase “Lord, help me be the person my dog thinks I am.” Well, there should be one that says “Lord, help me be the person Danielle thinks I am.”

My Crazy Sister- Kayla Mae (Peach)

Kayla has stuff. There is always something new happening in the world of the Kayla. She is the river, I am the tree. I stand and watch the river, amazed at all the directions it can take at once. I believe that because of this part of the Kayla-verse, she is also prepared to deal with my stuff. If I have stuff, Kayla is prepared. Let’s say I’m in a brawl—I could be going up against a 92 pound teenager who gives puppies to orphans for Christmas, or I could be going up against a 285 pound member of the Italian mafia—whatever my cause, Kayla’s got my back. She is all in. Once you get her, it’s all or nothing. Though we don’t share a bathroom any more, I’m happy to say that I’ve got myself a fully loaded Krazy Kayla to back me up.

My Best Girl- Audra Marie (Frodo)

She is the Frodo to my Sam. I am the Sam to her Frodo. We share one of the greatest bonds known to humanity—the bond that is absolutely and utterly unexplainable. On the surface, we’ve got about 3.2 things in common. Luckily, that’s all we need. But the lack of an obvious connection is a very important element in our story. We connect to make a whole. We are why god invented the teeter-totter. Yin and Yang learned its ways from us. Without Audra, I am a ball that won’t roll, I am a fork without a spoon, I am a chair with no cushion. A chair without a cushion can still be used as a chair, but what the hell’s the point? And what does she get from me? I fill the holes. Just as Frodo was the only one who could carry the Ring, Sam was the only one who could carry Frodo. Sure, she could make it to the fiery chasm without me, but there’s no way I’ll let her go alone.

My Wife- Lindsay (Weasel, member of the Trio)

Contrary to popular belief, Lindsay and I are not actually romantically linked. We are just madly in love with the idea of us. We have all BUT 3.2 things in common. You can appropriately sum us up through Netflix: You have 693 movies in common and 90% similarity with Lindsay! Have you ever had a conversation with someone in which you say “I didn’t think anyone else thought ______!” In our very first meetings we both said that numerous times. If you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to have another one of yourself, let me tell you, it’s pretty fun. It’s a rare and unique experience to come across that kind of thing outside of the SciFi channel. It’s a joy to be able to share your passion in life with someone who loves it just as much. It’s like discovering that someone from across the world has the same fingerprints as you do.

My Soul Sister- Amykins (Red, Granger, member of the Trio)

Of the 90% I have in common with Lindsay, there is a mathematically problematic different 90% that I have in common with Amy. It’s Trio math. There’s 200% to each of us apparently, and we share it in odd ways. We have the Koolaid of friendships. You need 3 things for Koolaid. Sugar, water, Koolaid powder. Mixed together it’s a magical drink. Out of all the people that I consider my siblings, Amy and I seem almost realistic. We were simply meant to be, and we are complimentary. There is a melding that is purely a natural occurrence. Think—chocolate and peanut butter. We bring out in each other what is hidden from the rest. She is my sunshine; the warm rays on my face after a cold wind. I am the Earth, Amy is my sun, and Lindsay is my moon.

My Little Sister- Katie (Niblet, Pip)

If there was ever a little sister that needed a big sister, it’s Katie. If there was ever a big sister in need of a Katie, it’s me. She is a complex machine in a tiny body, which works in an absurd unison with my very simple machine. We learn from each other, as sisters should. I have 7 ½ more years of experience being alive so I try to impart my wisdom when possible; and Katie, well she tends to tell me stuff I didn’t know that I didn’t know. There is something very important about our sistership. We pulled the universe aside and said “listen here! We ARE sisters, we didn’t need you to bring us forth from the same mother, we have chosen each other for these most important positions.” When presented with an opportunity to choose one’s family, I highly suggest you do so. It doesn’t happen every day. I just happened to get a 2-for-1 deal and got a Katie with a side of mom.

***This list certainly doesn’t contain all of my sisters over the years and the miles.
I’ve had many more. But these are the ones that have the biggest piece of the pie that is my world. (My next installment of reflections will have to do with moms and grandmoms.) ***

Wanted: Tiger Buddy

2008-02-16T22:04:00.007-06:00

I went to the Tiger Gold Rush tonight with Di and the fellas. Gold Rush is just a promotional thing to get people to come to the games and wear their Tiger colors. We have Black Outs as well, but I haven't been to one of those yet. The boys seem to like the games even if they don't always pay attention to what is going on. They like getting stamps on their hands and eating candy and popcorn, obviously.

However, the children can't always go to the games with me.
I need a (relatively) grown-up buddy for the Tiger basketball games and baseball games. Basketball is somewhat preferable currently only because it's not freezing in the colliseum. But when it's nice I am going to be very eager to be at Larks Park. It's no Coors Field, but it's baseball, it's about 4 blocks away, and I get to go for free.
I don't particularly like basketball that much as a sport but I like going to the games. I don't know any of the players here like I did in Arizona, which makes me terribly sad, but this is what I get for not living on campus I guess.
Surely there is someone willing to attend games and eat hotdogs and popcorn with me. I guess I'm taking applications for a new buddy so...if anybody knows anybody let me know.

Fifth school shooting in a week.

2008-02-15T15:15:00.003-06:00

You have got to be fucking kidding me. Let me say that I am so relieved that these psycho idiots often shoot themselves when they're done shooting other people. This latest psycho seemed like a pretty good guy so I'm sorry for his poor family that he's dead, but....turns out he wasn't that good of a guy or he wouldn't have SHOT A BUNCH OF PEOPLE.

Things are not as fantastic as they could be in the world right now, I'm aware of this. However, this dumbass was at least fortunate enough in finances and education to be able to attend graduate school. Things could be a lot worse. So, was it that he just couldn't "handle" it anymore? I really hope not. Medication or not, if you think it's a good idea to shoot almost anyone, then you're an idiot and I hope you get run over by a truck before you carry out your moronic plan. Then at least you'll realize that things can get worse for you!

This isn't just a crazy big city thing either. About a month ago one of these people with nothing better to do with their time wandered into Nextech a few blocks away from my house, here in little ol' Hays. He might have had an attack of conscience, or he just wasn't that committed, because he let everyone leave the building and then shot himself.

So, to recap: former Nextech employee in Hays wanders into building with gun.
Let's look at this for a minute. We live in Hays. It's relatively mellow here. We don't live in the inner city of Detroit. Nextech provides me with my phone and internet, therefore they are good. I might be angry if they fired me but would I want to shoot them for it? Hmm...I don't think I would. I think that if I did want to shoot them that I would be a stupid, shallow, and possibly troubled person.

The moral of the story here is this:

If you are crazy, don't stop taking your medication. And if you have the following thought: "Man, I'd just like to go shoot those people!" You should go commit yourself to the nearest mental health facility where they will give you some juice and lock you in a room with no weapons.

If you just really want to shoot something, maybe you should go hunting and at least kill something you can eat.

Don't be a jackass and ruin other people's lives because you can't handle the world. If you only want to kill yourself then eat cake until you're in a coma or something. I don't know.

Happy Hallmark Profits Day

2008-02-14T09:17:00.005-06:00

http://www.studiondr.com/cards/cards.html

"It's Valentine's Day and love is in the air.
It makes me wanna puke."

Happy February 14th.

On Feb. 14, 1929, the St. Valentine's Day Massacre took place in a Chicago garage as seven rivals of Al Capone's gang were gunned down.

On another note--From HRC.

In honor of Valentine's Day, I'm hoping you'll join me in signing the Million For Marriage petition.
I believe that ALL Americans, including gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender people, deserve the rights, responsibilities, and privileges that come with marriage. Please, join me in adding your voice to a million voices raised in support of marriage equality. The petition already has more than 875,000 signatures – we're almost there! Sign now at:
http://www.millionformarriage.org

Eli Stone: Watch It

2008-02-13T23:52:00.006-06:00

The show is brilliant. I say this with confidence after a whopping 2 episodes.

There are many TV shows that I love because they are awesome, funny, suberbly well made, and entertaining. But, few of them have made me laugh as much as Eli Stone has, especially in only 2 episodes.

Johnny Lee Miller is excellent, I have known this for a long time. He has the ideal comedic presence, along with an appropriate amount of coolness, charm and honesty, to be a great and memorable character.

The show is not only funny, but it's smart. There are times that interactions between characters could come off as lame or preachy, but they end up being hillarious while wallowing in truth and genuine humanity. For a show about a lawyer who hears things, that's saying something.

And for the icing on the cake? George Michael has so far been heard in each episode.

If you want a comparison think--Ally McBeal before it was lame.

If you want to catch up on the first 2 episodes, you can see them on ABC.com and the regular time I believe is 10/9c on Thursdays on ABC.

There are moments that are just wonderful, it's such a unique television experience. No kiddin'.

Some of my favorite quotes thus far:

Especially for Katie- "There's no future in existentialist ethics, so I got into acupuncture."

"I didn't come here for a theology seminar. I came here so you could stick me with a needle so that my life could stop providing its own soundtrack."

And the more meaningful reality check-

"Could be worse…you coulda spent 10 hours hidden in the back of a flatbed truck to come over here and get a job for 3 dollars an hour pickin’ strawberries in the 90 degree sun, 12 hours a day; turns out the pesticide the farm used made you infertile but that’s the least of your worries ‘cause that citizenship test you took was a fraud so they’re gonna deport you back to the country you risked everything to leave in the first place."

Oops...

2007-12-28T09:59:00.000-06:00

National Treasure 2: Book of Secrets- B+, Not quite as fun as the first but what do you expect when Sean Bean is nowhere to be seen? The movie was fun, I ask nothing more really. It's a little less believable than the first but that's the point of movies. All the same characters are there and Helen Mirren is a nice addition. Ed Harris is a necessary but average character. I've been scarred from History of Violence and can no longer take him seriously as a person.

Quick reviews

2007-12-28T09:47:00.000-06:00

I am Legend- B+. It's cool! Will Smith is the guy you want if there's pretty much only one guy in your movie. Katie almost had a stroke but a NORMAL person can handle the movie. It was fun.

Omega Man- D-. Pile of crap. I watched it in high school and somehow it must have gotten worse... I don't remember it even being that bad. Charlie is NOT the guy you want in your movie. He just stares at himself and gets naked all the time.

Wild Hogs- B+, It's kind of what you expect but funnier. William H. Macy is so cute, and John C. Reilly is like the sprinkles on top. He's that extra secondary character that makes a movie memorable. They got the right combination of comedy so that the movie wasn't just lame jokes.

Ratatouille- A-, At one point I was laughing to hard I was crying. (But not like when I was watching Omega Man.) The little rats are very cute and the main human character is just fun. He's kind of an idiot but in a nice endearing way.

Dexter (TV)- A+, I'm almost done with season 1 and it's just one of the greatest shows ever. Most of the other characters are generally irritating at times but Dexter is the ideal television character. I love him. It's on Showtime so I'll have to wait until season 2 comes out on DVD.

I hope someone is held responsible.

2007-12-27T11:11:00.000-06:00

I also hope they are stomped to death, but one thing at a time.
One might want to remember she also had 2 small children.

Apparently there are rules...

2007-12-13T12:57:00.000-06:00

I'm working on a chapter for my World Music class, and there's a section on karaoke.
It talks about the origins of karaoke, which are probably different/more important than what one might think.

I have discovered that there are actual rules for karaoke, which I would like to share (straight from the textbook):

1) Do not sing when you are drunk

2) Do not sing too loudly

3) Do not abuse the echo effect too much

4) Do not monopolize the microphone

5) Do not sing songs written for the opposite sex unless you want to surprise the audience

6) Do not sing songs written by very gifted writers (because they are usually too difficult for lay persons)

7) Do not be too narcissistic

To quote a karaoke club owner--"Japanese singers like to sing alone to show off their voice. Americans like to sing together, loud, chorus style and with dancing."

No surprise there. It's because they break rule #1.

Schilling vocal about Mitchell Report

2007-12-13T11:20:00.000-06:00

Schilling vocal about Mitchell Report 12/12/2007 9:42 PM ET
By Mike Petraglia / Special to MLB.comBOSTON --
He was one of baseball's most prominent stars to testify before Congress in March 2005 on illegal substances in baseball, beginning an information-gathering process that will reach its peak on Thursday afternoon.
Now, on the eve of the release of George Mitchell's report, Curt Schilling said he realizes the significance of the moment for the sport and its future.
"The hope, I think, for most people is that there will be some closure sometime soon and we move on," Schilling said. "I would imagine there will be a lot of shock, a lot of surprise, but I think as a sport, as an industry we're hopefully going to be held accountable for what's happened, from players to coaches to front office to ownership."
Schilling spoke Wednesday night at Boston's Millennium Hotel where he was supporting his wife Shonda at a skin cancer awareness fundraising event.
"There was a period of time when people turned a blind eye to it and now we're being called on the carpet for it and I guess that's what's supposed to happen," he said of baseball's investigation into alleged steroids and HGH use by its players.
The Red Sox ace said he is trying to be philosophical and keep an open mind about the potential names that could be released.
"I'm sure there will be some very disappointing revelations from a player's standpoint, to fans and players alike," Schilling said. "If this is what has to happen for us to move on, for the game to move on, for fans to buy back into the product, then that's what has to happen."
Schilling said if any past or current teammates are named, that won't change his feelings toward them.
"I don't think there'll be any difference," Schilling said. "I think that as players, short of someone telling you, 'I've made some comments very early on in my career about my opinions, but for the most part that's no more or less than anyone's idea.' You had opinions, you had thoughts. [Thursday], I would imagine we'll see some concrete evidence and a list of names that will validate what I think a lot of people thought in some cases and people will be stunned in others, but you deal with that on a personal basis."

Players, especially teammates, are like family, according to the right-hander.
"There have been a couple of names to come out of this that have really caught me off guard to the point where I'm not surprised anymore," he said. "I certainly want to believe we've heard all the names. I know that's not true. There's hope on my end that there aren't any names of people I'm close with and friends with, but if there are, that's not going to change how I feel about people. It's a mistake that a lot of people have made and I certainly don't change my friendships based on people making mistakes."
Schilling said he expects fans to deal with the issue on a more emotional level.
"Fans in Boston are probably going to vilify if someone in New York gets named, whereas, there might be leniency on the home team. It's almost like a member of your family. You don't stop loving someone in your family that gets in trouble. You're disappointed for sure, but you move on."
To Schilling, Thursday could be one of the more important days in baseball's near-future.
"It depends on how baseball addresses it," he said. "There is a policy in place now. I don't know how players' names are going to be handled. If they're going to be found as failing, I'm not sure know how it's going to be addressed. I think a lot of how the players and the game handles it will determine how people look on the sport."
*****************************************************
I think Curt's right. People are going to be angry no matter what. If they weren't, it wouldn't be quite such a big deal.
With the exception of Barry Bonds and a few others, baseball players remain some of the least irritating/ridiculous/self-centered professional athletes. I think football is at an all-time low, and basketball has an attitude problem. If the lords and masters of baseball screw this up, it will be a great disappointment. Players need to take responsibility for what they are doing, AND they need to stop it. If they don't they should pack up and stay home. If you're not good enough then you're not good enough. Don't ruin it for the ones that came to play. Managers need to take responsibility for their teams. Owners need to take responsibility for their managers. For the most part, they know exactly what names are going to be on the list and they were hoping no one else would know. Having a jacked up freak like Barry on your team might sell more tickets, but is it worth ruining the game? It's baseball not Barryball. It's not about that one big hitter, it's about the team. Why do you think they wear matching outfits??
I'm sure I'll be disappointed too, but if MLB does what it should then I'll feel a lot better about the whole thing.

Something I wanted to respond to...

2007-11-30T10:21:00.000-06:00

You call me:"redneck""Hillbilly""Slaker""Cracker""Honkey""Whitey""Gringo""Sage"and you think it's OK.

But when I call you: jungle bunny, spear chucker, coon, wet back, jiggaboo, porch monkey, sand nigger, rag head, towel head, Camel Jockey, Gook, Spook, NIGG*R, KIKE, slant eyes, Chink, Grease Monkeys created by shane hair, you call me a racist.

--You have the United Negro College Fund.

--You have Martin Luther King Day

--You have Black History Month

--You have Cesar Chavez Day

--You have Yom Hashoah

--You have Ma'uled Al-Nabi

--You have the NAACP

--You have BET

--If we had WET(white entertainment television) ...we'd be racist.

--If we had a White Pride Day... you would call us racist.

--If we had white history month... we'd be racist.

--If we had an organization for only whites to "advance" our lives... we'd be racist.

--If we had a college fund that only gave white students scholarships...you know we'd be racist.

--In the Million Man March, you believed that you were marching for your race and rights. If we marched for our race and rights...you would call us racist.

--Did you know that some high school students decided to make a club for only the white students because the other ethnicities had them. they all got sent to court for being racist but the african-american, Latino, and Asian clubs were not even questioned.

--You are proud to be black, brown, yellow and orange, and you're not afraid to announce it. But when we announce our white pride, you call us racists.

I am white and I am proud. But, you call me a racist.

Why is it that only whites can be racists?

Now watch, I'll be racist for reposting this. So what? no-one will re-post this for fear of being called racistif you agree w/ this than repost saying"i'm not RACIST but its true.

My response to the poor idiot:

I see the good points but it's still offensive. Whites weren't enslaved for their entire lives, forced to build things that killed them on a regular basis, and treated like animals. SO, therefore, we should have a better sense of humor about names that minorities rarely call us. We have Colombus Day, President's Day, Easter, Christmas, etc. I'm not Christian yet I'm not generally offended by Christmas. I'm offended by fundamental Christians yes, but not the holiday that everyone misinterprets. The reason people created things (holidays, chanels, groups, etc.) to cater to minorities is because they do not get representation in other areas. White folks have all the attention they need and should stop their baby-ass whining. I get the point, and it's true that we wouldn't be able to have WET, but who the hell would want it?? We have CMT, that's close enough. The white male that wrote this should probably look into a history class before he starts to criticize too heavily. "If we marched for our race and rights..." Um, WE DON'T HAVE TO! That's the point. Plenty of non-whites are racist. Don't get to feeling all sory for yourself now. Silly redneck...

Pride of 2007

2007-11-28T13:00:00.000-06:00

The most exciting thing to happen almost ever was the magnificent run by the Colorado Rockies this season. I would have been content with the pummeling we handed over to the Yankees in the middle of the summer. But that wasn't good enough for them, they had to go all fancy and demolish all competition in the last month of the regular season. 'Twas awesome!

Is it any wonder that by the time we got to the World Series in OCTOBER that we were pooped? I think it is a much more honorable thing to have won our own title, the National League Championships, rather than the "big one."

I never realized before how silly the World Series was. It's just the All-Star Game minus the rest of the all-stars. It's cool, and way to go if you win but it doesn't really illustrate what you've done over the rest of the season. We played the Red Sox. Big deal. I have nothing invested in beating the Red Sox aside from beating the Red Sox. Now, beating the Diamondbacks, that's exciting. Those are our brothers. The Red Sox are the weird, rich, hulking cousins that we only see once a year.

So, basically, it's a disappointment that we did so dismally in the series. But as the banner in my hut will show, I am exceedingly proud of the boys for winning the one that counts. We are the 2007 National League Champions, and we deserve it! We Rock!

The joys of life.

2007-11-28T12:20:00.000-06:00

- No class

- Sean Bean

- Sleeping

- Dreaming: Last night there was several things happening. Some sort of crypt thing, monsters creeping about. I got to a room with 5 wooden caskets only to discover they were all bombs. I took a peek at the bomb clock and headed back up the stairs. Someone resembling Alan Rickman (no surprise to anyone) was the bad guy who was going to prevent me from leaving. I used my purple mittens (the ones I keep in my car) to fly down a wire and run away just before the crypt house exploded.

Next was a strange game of battle solitaire. It involves monster things, soldiers, and Andre the Giant. Oh, and big guns that do fancy things. It's quite a fun game and if I can invent it I suggest everyone play it. Basically, your "guys" can't come up and help until you "uncover" them--like in solitaire. It's a whole crazy thing.

- Baked goods

- Nice weather

- Shopping

- Baseball

- Hotdogs

- Boris Karloff

- Getting mail

- Aerosmith

- Rain

- Donuts

- Puppies

- Gum

- Friday's with Katie

- Tommy Girl

~That's all the listing I wish to do at the moment. Not that there aren't other joys but to list them all would be impossible.~

Find your candidate.

2007-11-05T12:21:00.000-06:00

I am yet undecided on who to vote for so I thought this was kinda cool. As I told the lady from the Democratic party the other day, I'm going to be so sick of all the candidates by the time I need to vote for one, I won't want to vote for any of them.

If you too are undecided then this might actually be helpful.

http://www.vajoe.com/candidate_calculator.html

I got a 90.91% match with Mike Gravel. I've liked him from the start so that's nice. It's a bit surprising to see where the rest of the candidates stand based on my responses.

Your Other Top Matches

Ohio Representative Dennis Kucinich (D) - 81.82%

Delaware Senator Joseph Biden (D) - 77.27%

Illinois Senator Barack Obama (D) - 77.27%

Middle of the Pack

New Mexico Governor Bill Richardson (D) - 77.27%

Former North Carolina Senator John Edwards (D) - 72.73%

New York Senator Hillary Clinton (D) - 68.18%

Connecticut Senator Christopher Dodd (D) - 68.18%

Former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani (R) - 54.55%

Businessman John Cox (R) - 45.45%

Former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee (R) - 40.91%

Arizona Senator John McCain (R) - 31.82%

Former Massachusetts Governor Mitt Romney (R) - 31.82%

Texas Representative Ron Paul (R) - 27.27%

Bottom of the Barrel

Colorado Representative Tom Tancredo (R) - 27.27%

Kansas Senator Sam Brownback (R) - 22.73%

Former Tennessee Senator Fred Thompson (R) - 22.73%

California Representative Duncan Hunter (R) - 18.18%

I stand corrected...

2007-10-22T17:37:00.001-05:00

As do we all.

(This blog is a little late coming but here I am anyway.)

Everybody thought the Arizona/Colorado series was going to be a heck of a thing. It was I guess, but I don't think anyone foresaw a 4-0 victory, least of all the Rockies.

Now we're on the eve of the World Series. We now know that we'll be playing the Red Sox. During the Indians/Sox series my thought was, I would rather play the Indians but I would rather beat the Red Sox. When those teams were quarreling and being...childish, I changed my mind. After dealing with the attitude of the D-backs and seeing the attitude of the others I don't really want to play any of them!

The Rockies have Altitude, not attitude. They don't open their mouths and insert their cleats. They don't show off. They don't act like a bunch of petulant children. It's such a treat.

So, I'm looking forward to the series and all (even if they don't let me have tickets) but I'm really tired of watchng big boys act like little boys. I wish some of these testosterone-pumped freaks would take a look at a team that actually acts according to their character.

I can hope that the fans follow suit.

A-hole fans.

2007-10-11T22:54:00.000-05:00

The disrespectful Diamondback fans should be ashamed of themselves!

That's directed at the ones who throw crap on the field after a call that they don't like. You make your team look bad, you ruin things for other people, and you are an idiot. Don't throw things at players because you don't like a call. Grow up.

If you want to be a jerk then go be a fan of something else.

Baseball still has a shred of decency and dignity left in the pro sports world.

MLB POST-SEASON: Let me ‘splain.

2007-10-09T12:40:00.000-05:00

This is for those of you who don't understand what the hell is going on and why everyone is making such a fuss. It's taken me years to finally understand.

MLB POST-SEASON: Let me ‘splain.

In the major leagues we have the American League (AL) and the National League (NL). I don’t really know why, but I know that the NL is cooler.
Each league has three divisions: East, Central, and West. Those divisions are:

AL East:
Baltimore Orioles
Boston Red Sox
New York Yankees
Tampa Bay Devil Rays
Toronto Blue Jays

AL Central:
Chicago White Sox
Cleveland Indians
Detroit Tigers
Kansas City Royals
Minnesota Twins

AL West:
Los Angeles Angels
Oakland Athletics
Seattle Mariners
Texas Rangers

NL East:
Atlanta Braves
Florida Marlins
New York Mets
Philadelphia Phillies
Washington Nationals

NL Central:
Chicago Cubs
Cincinnati Reds
Houston Astros
Milwaukee Brewers
Pittsburgh Pirates
St. Louis Cardinals

NL West:
Arizona Diamondbacks
Colorado Rockies
Los Angeles Dodgers
San Diego Padres
San Francisco Giants

The winners for 2007 are the following:
AL East Division Champs- Boston Red Sox
AL Central Division Champs- Cleveland Indians
AL West Division Champs- Los Angeles Angels
AL Wild Card- New York Yankees

NL East Division Champs- Philadelphia Phillies
NL Central Division Champs- Chicago Cubs
NL West Division Champs- Arizona Diamondbacks
NL Wild Card- Colorado Rockies

You may now ask, “So what the hell is the Wild Card?” Wild Card, as far as I understand, is the team with the next best record in their league. It is just as it says, the wild card. You need 4 teams for playoffs so basically someone gets a second chance. This year the Padres and Rockies were tied at the end of the regular season for first place (essentially first for second place) in the NL Wild Card. They had a rare one-game tie-breaker playoff. Rockies won naturally. In 13 innings. Naturally.

This brings us to the official post-season.

Division Series- best of 5.
ALDS:
Yankees v. Indians
&
Red Sox v. Angels

NLDS:
Cubs v. Diamondbacks
&
Rockies v. Phillies

Indians won in 4 games.
Red Sox won in 3 games.
Diamondbacks won in 3 games.
Rockies won in 3 games.

Next is the League Championship Series- best of 7. (Also known as the pennant race.)

AL: Indians v. Red Sox
NL: Diamondbacks v. Rockies

The teams who win their 4 games in the League Championships will go on to play each other in the World Series, which is a best of 7 series.

Lights out for Phillies

2007-10-07T14:27:00.000-05:00

Well, well...look who's kicking ass here in the beginning of Rocktober.

Rox have won yet another awesome game, just as they have 17 times in their last 18 games. And FINALLY we are showing the rest of the baseball world what many of us have known for a long time. We just needed another chance.

We can win in the dark if we have to.

We can win without homeruns from Matt, Todd, Brad, Garrett, and Troy. An occassional homerun from Yorvit and Kaz is quite a treat. The starting pitchers come out and shut down the opposition, the closers come out and finish the task. Infielders are on the ball, literally, and the outfield is on alert. Everybody does what they need to do when they need to do it.

Now, talk about a good series...Rockies v. Diamondbacks. Proof that the West is the best. This ain't gonna be a sweep. It's going to be a hell of a series.

Rock on boys.

ROCKIES!!!!

2007-10-02T12:04:00.000-05:00

TAKE THAT TONY GWYNN!! No one gave the Rockies any credit all season! Now you'll have to sit and watch the awesomeness for just a little longer!

MATT HOLLIDAY~MVP
T.R.O.Y. = Tulowitzki for Rookie Of the Year
CLINT HURDLE~MANAGER OF THE UNIVERSE
TODD JUST F'N ROCKS!

I should beat someone to the movie.

2007-09-18T12:08:00.000-05:00

Ok not to be insensitive or anything, but this is kind of cool....

It's a SciFi channel movie in the making! I hope they figure out what the deal is.

Mystery illness strikes after meteorite hits Peruvian village
Mon Sep 17, 11:23 PM ET
LIMA (AFP) - Villagers in southern Peru were struck by a mysterious illness after a meteorite made a fiery crash to Earth in their area, regional authorities said Monday.
Around midday Saturday, villagers were startled by an explosion and a fireball that many were convinced was an airplane crashing near their remote village, located in the high Andes department of Puno in the Desaguadero region, near the border with Bolivia.
Residents complained of headaches and vomiting brought on by a "strange odor," local health department official Jorge Lopez told Peruvian radio RPP.
Seven policemen who went to check on the reports also became ill and had to be given oxygen before being hospitalized, Lopez said.
Rescue teams and experts were dispatched to the scene, where the meteorite left a 100-foot-wide (30-meter-wide) and 20-foot-deep (six-meter-deep) crater, said local official Marco Limache.
"Boiling water started coming out of the crater and particles of rock and cinders were found nearby. Residents are very concerned," he said.

Dear Britney, Kanye, and your fellow "artists"...

2007-09-10T11:01:00.000-05:00

(I didn't even watch the f*#&ing show and I'm horrified.)

Britney, give it up. Please. For the sake of all involved. I had a bit of hope for her and her "comeback." I had faith that Paris would change after her stint as an inmate and I was right. She's far less annoying than she was before. Still an idiot but she's trying. Britney is making no such effort. Oh she's making an effort but it's in the wrong direction. I was so hoping that she might have found some class under all that blonde hair but that's asking too much. If I was her manager I would have said this-- Ok so you're making some sort of comeback, great. Let's ditch the bleach and go with the new look. Short hair, good coloring, something elegant yet funky; let's ditch the whore/stripper wardrobe, everyone knows you're a mother of 2 now. Cover yourself like a grown up. Again, elegance would be nice. Something classy that doesn't look like you slept in an alley. As far as the song goes, let's do something with lyrics, cut the bubblegum out, skip the worn-out dance moves, and attempt to pretend like you have talent.

But alas...what did we end up with? Let's show off that bad hair, make sure it looks like you havent' showered in a while. Totally show off that mom tummy that you KNOW everyone will just think is adorable. Then to top it all off let's pick the dumbest song ever and make sure there's the same old Madonna wanna-be dance moves that you can no longer perform. Nice, we got all that? Time for the VMAs.

Girl, fire whoever you have working for you because they are useless. Go home and take care of your children, and if you can't do that at least let them escape to daddy K-Fed's house for a bit of normalcy. Yes, I see the irony, don't you? Have someone write you a song with a little substance and quit with the blonde slut routine. It's not working anymore. You have to be underage for that to work around here....or Pamela Anderson apparently.

And speaking of Pam-- Kid Rock and Tommy Lee? Take it to the playground. What could they have been brawling over other than the plastic wonder woman. She'll always go back to Tommy. Way to act like adults.

Further teenage behavior-- Kanye bitching about a black man can't get a chance at the VMAs! Yeah buddy, that's what you should be worried about. No matter that you're apparently selling a shit load of records (though I couldn't name a song if my life depended on it), you totally haven't made it until you get a VMA. Give me a break you crying fool. Oh yes it's 'cause you're black, black folks never make it in the music industry. Maybe it's your piss poor attitude. Maybe you should shut the hell up and go galavanting in your Crib with your homies.

"That's two years in a row, man ... give a black man a chance," said West, stomping around his entourage and directing his comments at a reporter. "I'm trying hard man, I have the ... No. 1 record, man."
It was the latest outburst from West at an awards show. Last year, he crashed the stage at the MTV Europe Awards after not winning for best video. (Wonder if he ever considered that he did not have the best video.)
West's latest album, "Graduation," is due out Tuesday. 50 Cent has said he'd stop making solo records if West's CD outsells his "Curtis" album, also set for release Tuesday, in their first week out. (Aww...what a blow that would be to the state of the country.)

To sum things up, the music industry needs to pull it's big inflated head out of it's useless whiney ass. There's maybe a handfull of people at the VMAs that have any sort of actual talent, and even some of those feel entitled to awards and whatnot just because everyone gets an award these days. You don't have to do much but throw some skanks together on a screen to win so it seems.

Alicia has class, even if she looked like a cat on crack. Beyonce has class, even if she was asking for a wardrobe malfunction. Even Justin has class, and a bit of sense. They all have talent. I don't know who the rest of you sorry assholes are in the first place, but shut up and make music because you want to make music not because you want some pathetic award.

Fred Thompson...

2007-09-06T08:52:00.000-05:00

stay on TV.

From here it looks like he's just on an anti-Clinton mission. Why else would he make his late-in-the-game appearance? He's a freak. His mission is to do exactly what G.W. is doing....yeah, that's a good way to get elected. Idiot.

Theories from an 8-year-old

2007-08-25T20:54:00.000-05:00

I just wanted to share this story with the few people that actually read my blog.

I went to dinner on Friday night with Dina and Ben and the boys. Well, kinda dinner...I had just finished eating when Dina called so I just went along for the company and the entertainment that usually comes with dining out with the gremlins.

Both boys say school is going fine, Tanner has lost a few more teeth, and Jordan is as weird as ever. He left to go to the bathroom before we left and naturally Dina had to retrieve him from the ladies room.

The main story here is from Tanner though. We were outside chatting by the car and we were talking about pets. Tanner claims that when they get a dog they will name it Dorko, Jordan suggested Chester. Tanner said they were going to get a big dog when they move into their new house, and it's going to be a girl.

He also told me the following: "They have to go into her tummy and plug up her poop hole so she can't have any babies."

I told him I didn't think that was quite the way it was done since she still had to be able to poop. Then, while Dina was trying to control her laughing fit, both gremlins started yelling things about "poop deck" and the hillarity of the situation was confirmed. It was very entertaining as always, and that ends my installment of Tanner theories for today.

Oops, missed one.

2007-08-22T14:29:00.000-05:00

Bourne Ultimatum- It's the ultimate Bourne. ha! True though, it's just crazyness all over the place, Matt has like 4 lines and he spends the rest of his time driving into other cars, beating the hell out of people, and running. He's so sneaky.

I also just finished: Dead Silence- Pretty standard horror. Really ridiculous, but sufficiently creepy I suppose. Not worth much in general. It would fit in with the Sci Fi channel Saturday line-up quite nicely. (I LOVE Sci Fi weekends but it's almost all horrid crap.)

I'm so terribly far behind...

2007-08-22T11:43:00.000-05:00

So, you're getting the short and sweet.

Three Amigos- Freakin' hillarious. A total comedy classic.

Bringing Up Baby- Quite funny in that Cary Grant, Katharine Hepburn kind of way.

Goldeneye- Sean Bean. Young and evil. Awesome.

Pagemaster- I was doing a bit more chatting that watching, but it's very cute.

Soldier's Girl- Plot outline from IMDB: The true story of a young soldier beaten to death for falling in love with a transgendered nightclub performer. It's quite good, but obviously depressing.

Spiderman 3- I liked Peter when he was crazy, Sandman was super cool, and other than that it's your basic Spiderman movie, and MJ is annoying as ever.

The Thing (original)- Good for a classic monster movie but kinda boring.

Three Musketeers- I watched it because it's on my list but I can't remember a damn thing.

13 Ghosts- Still one of my favorite creepy movies. It's all about the monsters, they are really cool.

Poltergiest- It's a horror classic, and I recently discovered that it's quite funny. I had no idea.

Invasion of the Body Snatchers- It's totally ridiculous, a little bit gross, but fun to watch.

Toolbox Murders- Terrifically disgusting.

Dodgeball- Brilliant masterpiece. I could watch it over and over.

Pretty in Pink- I hadn't seen it for a while so I thought I should watch it again. It's nowhere as cool as Sixteen Candles or Breakfast Club but it's watchable.

24-Hour Party People- I watched it again because I forgot that I already saw it. It's not that great, but it's interesting. It could be better.

40-Year Old Virgin- The humor is blended in a very nice combination of lame boy humor, and plain funny stuff. Steve Carrell is too adorable.

Pirates of the Caribbean 3- Just as fun as the other 2. Nothing outdoes the first one, but I thought #3 was funny. They'll make at least another one.

Mr. Brooks- Awful. Just awful. I thought it could possibly not suck but I was wrong.

Shrek 3- Definitely better than #2, might be the best of the bunch.

1408- Predictable, and already been done. Crazy dad in a possessed hotel? Really? However, it was fun to watch, and I wasn't angry I paid to see it.

Die hard 4- Completely awesome. The best since the original. Had Alan made it to this one it would be the best thing ever. There's a clear line between reality and the land of Mclaine, but that's why it's so fun. The humor and action are equally distributed, which makes it very fun to watch.

The Simpsons Movie- Great. It's an extra long episode of the Simpsons with nudity. There's not really any wrong here.

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix- Pales in comparison to The Goblet of Fire, but good on it's own. Not even comparible to the book of course, but a very fun movie. It's so much more fun the second time and after finishing book 7. I think it's the funniest movie so far.

The Invasion- One of the Nicole Kidman, Daniel Craig projects. The movie was pretty good actually. It's not completely different from the 1978 Donald Sutherland movie, it's just less ridiculous since it's not the 1978 Donald Sutherland movie.... The whole body snatching virus this is pretty creepy.

And finally, last night's gem--

Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon- it's about a group of students who are making a documentary about a man who is going to become the next Jason, Freddy, or Michael. It turns into a regular slasher flick by the end, but the beginning is hillarious. If you've ever laughed at a slasher movie you should definitely watch it. It shows the planning stage from the mind of the killer and he's damn funny. Basically cameos from Robert Englund and Zelda Rubenstein.

Aaaaannnd...there it is.

2007-06-29T10:21:00.000-05:00

When desperate, always blame racism. It seems that this guy has a serious attitude problem and rather than keep any of his pride in tact he pulls this BS out. Please, dude. I don't care if your black, I think you're just a regular asshole. You'd still be an asshole if you were white.
I'm not saying we're not a racist country, but this isn't really where the issue lies.

Washington: "I Was Fired Because I'm Black"
Actor Isaiah Washington insists the only reason he was fired from TV show Grey's Anatomy for making a homophobic remark was because of the color of his skin. Washington infamously made an offensive comment about castmate T.R. Knight last October and repeated it at the Golden Globe Awards earlier this year. But the 43-year-old claims he was fired from Grey's Anatomy earlier this month because America can't find it in its heart to forgive an African-American. He cites the examples of actor Robert Downey, Jr., who has rebuilt his career despite multiple run-ins with the police over his drug problems, and politician Arnold Schwarzenneger, who has fought allegations of sexual misconduct. Washington tells U.S. magazine Newsweek, "I apologized and showed my remorse for what I said and for the pain I caused anyone. If a black man can't get forgiveness in this country, when so many other people like Robert Downey, Jr. and the governor of California get second and third chances... I think that says a lot about race and this country where we stand."

More presidential candidates: Barack Obama

2007-06-13T23:00:00.000-05:00

Pros: First thing's first, it would be sweet if we had a African-American president. I have no problem saying it. Lots of people are thinking it.

This guy worked for what he has. I mean he actually had to prove himself rather than using his daddy's money to prove nothing.

Watch the well made video on his webpage and you'll want to vote for him right now. http://www.barackobama.com/about/

He is personable and likeable, and miracle of all miracles he almost seems like a relatively normal human being. I actually believe the words that come out of his mouth.

He seems prepared to bridge the red-blue gap if at all possible. He's going after the common ground that somehow gets ignored even though that's what we all want.

He's very nicely placed himself in the middle of the road which makes it all the more likely for anyone to vote for him.

Cons: There is a whole heck of a lot of racist, redneck, SOBs in the world that will not vote for a black guy. It's the simple truth. It's likely they don't know when the election is so that's a plus.

He might be just too perfect and idealistic. I don't know if people are ever going to be prepared for an honest politician with possible good intentions.

I read that he smokes. He should cut that out.

More presidential candidates: Dennis Kucinich

2007-06-13T22:51:00.000-05:00

Pros: The dude has a peace sign on his webpage.

He's kinda groovy, and I like a lot of what he says.

He is involved in a LOT of issues, not just the key, hot-button stuff.

His civil rights record is fantastic.

Cons: He's been a Family Guy joke...therefore, since I know relatively little about him, it's hard to not think about the Family Guy reference.

He sometimes looks like a cartoon turtle.

I don't think he'll make it past the popular kids. I don't know.

Movie Reviews Gone Wild

2007-06-12T19:24:00.000-05:00

Carrie- Awesome horror movie. (Of course I've seen it before, but I forgot how brilliant it was.) It's so well made and since it's horror no one pays attention to that part. If you've seen it then you should watch it again some day and pay attention to the details and if you haven't then...hello, it's a classic.

Kill Bill 2- I thought I'd give this a try right after Grindhouse and when I was feeling good about QT. It didn't really work though. I still found it rather boring. It's ok, just not something I'd go out of my way to watch.

The Bad Seed- The child is creepy. It's also a classic and the little girl is very believable as a homicidal child. It's one to watch if you're into the classics but not one everyone would enjoy.

Wishmaster 3 & 4- So I dig Wishmaster, sue me! Not even close to being as fun as the first 2. Andrew Divoff was awesome as the djinn in the first two because he's so ridiculous. As I recall, #4 is a little more fun but it's not the same without the original dude. Still fun and bloody though.

Batman- Of course I've seen the original Batman before but I put it on the list because it should be recognized. The movie is hillarious. It's very clever, Michael and Jack are just supremely entertaining.

Unforgiven- Apparently a classic in the western genre. It's a good movie, it's well done, it's just kinda boring. Great cast, and good performances though.

Raging Bull- It's kind of what you think it will be. Crazy Italian gets knocked in the head too many times and gets a little crazier. Something about it sticks with you though. The end is depressing; the downfall of a champion is never nice to watch. Also a classic.

Eraserhead- There are no sensible words to describe this movie. It's very interesting as far as studying film goes but as entertainment it's quite a stretch. I assume the fact that I find it almost painful to watch would make the director do a happy dance. It's nearly unbearable, but you keep watching. I don't get it. It's extremely bizarre and you WILL remember it after you watch it.

He Knows You're Alone- Total lame-ass ripoff of Halloween. It's the first movie Tom Hanks did and he's very Tom Hanks in it. Cuddly and adorable. The movie stinks, but kind of in a fun way...

Prom Night- Another Jamie Lee Curtis attempt. It's too long to be interesting. I appreciate the effort though.

The Shining- Another one that I have, of course, seen before but I needed to watch again. It's so damn good. I cannot stand the wife but I ignore that and enjoy the rest of the movie. Again, Jack is simply brilliant.

Planes, Trains, and Automobiles- One of the humor gems that everyone should watch. Classic Steve Martin and John Candy.

The Condemned- Such the macho movie, but man it was fun to watch. It's just bad all over the place but who can resist Stone Cold and Vinnie Jones! The non-criminals in the film are the actual bad guys, and they attempt to make a "statement" about watching violent movies. It's hillarious. I'll admit I'd watch it again, but I'm certainly not going to take it seriously. The handheld camera was too much through the whole thing. It's supposed to be a "reality" thing, well there wouldn't be a handheld camera now would there? Do a little research before you try to get creative.

Friday the 13th, Part 3- Just as lame as the others.

Racing Stripes- Cute for the kiddos.

Shock Corridor- Surprisingly interesting. A guy goes in to an asylum to get a story and hey he goes crazy. The main character is pretty interesting to watch, as are the crazy people, even if the rest of it is somewhat pathetic.

The House That Dripped Blood- Oh what a movie. I LOVED it! It's absolutely necessary for any horror movie fan. Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee are the essence of what horror should be and this is great because of them. The little stories keep your attention and move on to the next story just when they should. It's no 5 star film but I thought it was great. They are willing to make fun of themselves and that's always fun.

New Pet

2007-06-06T23:52:00.000-05:00

This is my new Colorado buffalo. His name is Kerwin. His brother, who will live with Katie, has yet to be named. And at the moment Katie is hysterical, and totally unable to control herself so he might not be named for a while. We have to wait for the giggle fits to stop coming in waves.

Kerwin and his brother are the mascots for the Katie and Kathay Colorado Trip.

We're having far too much fun for our own good. It's fantastic.

My early take on the presidential candidates: Mike Gravel

2007-05-31T15:43:00.000-05:00

Mike Gravel: It's not pronounced like playground gravel, it's GravEL.

Pros: Supports gay marriage! There's one. He doesn't have a chance but it's nice to know.

I think he's probably an excellent candidate but I don't know if he'll get through the mess.

I watched a short CNN interview with him and he's got some good ideas, and a great personality. It's too bad we don't vote for people like that.

During a debate he said that someone scared the "bejesus" out of people, and asked "Who the hell are we gonna nuke!?" He says what we're thinking. I like it.

He's be a fun vice president.

Cons: I just don't know who this guy is. There isn't (yet) any name recognition.

My early take on the presidential candidates: John Edwards

2007-05-31T15:11:00.000-05:00

Just so I'm clear, these are in fact MY opinions of pros and cons. By no means do I speak for anyone else.

John Edwards: I voted for him last time so he's got a slight lead on the others this time.

Pros: He's young! He might actually know what the hell I was talking about if I said something to him about ANYTHING I do on a regular basis.

Excellent record for women's rights, and gay rights (though he opposes gay marriage...of course).

He discusses practical things like education and health care just as much as he talks about the war.

He is also very present online, and has a lot of information on his webpage.

I've liked him since long before the last election when I saw him on C-SPAN talking about affordable education, and how crippling it is for students to graduate into a mountain of debt.

Cons: Having some current issues with hypocricy. Yay middle class, yay expensive hair cut! I don't really care what the guy does with his hair, but it doesn't look very good.

He's a lawyer. They are all lawyers but he's made a ton of money at it. That means that someone probably get screwed along the way. Not cool.

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I am a big John fan. I think he would like to do things to change the bigger picture rather than bandaid the issues. Everyone wants a quick fix right now. Bring the soldiers home, impeach Cheney, get Bush out and it'll all be ok! Well, that's not gonna work. You can't go in, smash a country to bits and then leave it that way. We need to fix some shit first so that the civilians who are left alive have a change at a normal existence, THEN we can get the hell out. He's aware of this.

In addition to that he's a personable guy, he has cute children, and he's handsome--very presidential look. He'd look great on a stamp. Can you picture George on a stamp? No way.

Presidential Candidates: Chris Dodd

2007-05-31T14:55:00.000-05:00

Chris Dodd:

Pros: Supportive of women's rights judging by his voting history.

Supports civil unions.

Received a 0% from the Christian Coalition for an "anti-family" voting record. (That basically means he doesn't tell me what I can do with my uterus.)

Cons: Apposes gay marriage. (I know this is going to come up every time but it matters to ME so I'm going to put it here.)

His webpage is terrible.

He seems like he could possibly be gung-ho over the war and not the presidency as a whole. Maybe not but, I'm voting for a whole president not just a war blocker. Preferably anyway.

He's kind of scary looking which doesn't help, and he's 63 and has very small children. Way to go but it's weird. I just don't get anything off of this guy. He's very blah.

My early take on the presidential candidates: Hillary Clinton

2007-05-28T15:18:00.000-05:00

Hillary Clinton

We all know who she is so there's no need to tell you about her.

Pros: As far as I can tell, Hillary and I agree on virtually every major "issue." She's the first female presidential candidate with any kind of reasonable support. That's pretty cool. Like her or not, I think she knows what she's doing.

Cons: Let's face it, the only REAL problem with Hillary is that she's Hillary. Lots of people, I will go out on a limb and say mainly males, will not vote for her just because. It's funny that men want to vote for men, but DEFINITELY won't vote for a woman that acts like a man. There is skewed logic somewhere in the equation.

Assuming that Hillary won't win (who knows) the problem here is that she might negatively affect the outcome of the election because she has support enough to do OK, and support enough to remove some from other more-likely-to-actually-win candidates. It's that old third party Independent problem we have since not enough people vote and those who do are pretty evenly divided...one might be a worthy candidate for their party but is it worth it to risk sacrificing the White House to the other side?

My early take on the presidential candidates: Joe Biden

2007-05-28T13:36:00.000-05:00

My early take on the presidential candidates:

-Senator Joe Biden from Delaware.

Pros: Very present on the web, this means he's aware that younger people do vote.

Advocate for affordable education, again with the awareness.

Wrote the Violence Against Women's Act.

Middle name is Robinette, has a lovely smile, had a grandpa Finnigan, and uses public transportation-250 miles a day. His mother lives with him and he says his sister is his best friend.

Cons: He's so-so on reproductive rights. (Though he says he's uncomfortable enforcing his own beliefs on all others. Basically.)

Voted Yes on prohibiting same-sex marriage, but No on a constitutional ban. He says that same-sex marriage is "inevitable." Not a great attitude.

He's a bit too Catholic.

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His first wife and 13 month old daughter were killed, and both sons were injured in a car accident while Christmas shopping in the early 70s. As anyone who hasn't lived a charmed life knows, these kinds of things keep you in the realm of reality.

Personality and aura wise I like him quite a lot. He's got character. He seems like a normal, reasonable person who actually thinks about what is coming out of his mouth. He's not overly shiny (fake), and seems to kinda know what he's doing. He's not my ideal but there is no such thing.

Apparently his mother watches CNN religiously and askes God for forgiveness everytime she curses at George Bush.

If you want to know a bit about him I'd suggest watching the C-SPAN interview on his website.

http://www.joebiden.com/welcome/

Excitment of living in Hays.

2007-05-27T23:38:00.000-05:00

We saw the lights and hoopla while browsing garage sales, but we were betting on a meth lab rather than a harmless pipe.

Errant tube becomes a bomb scare for police
May 25, 2007
By STACIE SANDALL
Hays Daily News
Just before Hays residents could get settled into a three-day Memorial Day weekend, the chaos of sirens, flashing lights and a loud “bang” penetrated the air late Friday afternoon.
According to Hays Police Sgt. Dan Koerner, at about 4:41 p.m. Fort Hays State University campus police officer Tom Meiers found what appeared to be a pipe bomb laying in the middle of the intersection of 13th Street and General Custer.
After it was exploded, it was determined that the device was nothing more than registration papers for a flat fed trailer owned by High Plains Roofing.
Koerner said the object was a six-inch piece of galvanized pipe, about 2 1/2 inches in diameter. It had end caps and a hole that looked like it was fuse-ready.
Meiers called the police department, and both HPD and the Hays Fire Department responded. Several blocks were cordoned off and the decision was made to call the federal Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives. The Wichita Police Department’s bomb squad was dispatched to the scene.
“They detonated the device and retrieved part of it for evidence,” Koerner said. “They use a very small amount of explosives that is going to basically preserve most of the evidence.”
But there weren’t any wires or a detonator. Instead, it was simply the registration papers.
Tom Phillips, owner of the company, was unaware of the incident until a call from the media Saturday morning.
“It’s just something we put together for years to keep the registrations dry and handy — until they fall off and cause a commotion,” he said. “What a way to get some publicity.”
Most of the tubes are welded to the flatbeds, though some are strapped down. High Plains Roofing uses the flatbeds to haul materials and equipment to and from job sites. Phillips said 13th Street is a common route for his trucks to get back to the office.
“If a roll of insulation fell off a truck, you’d notice it. But not one of those tubes,” Phillips said.
The event consumed a lot of manpower, time and resources, Koerner said. The entire ordeal took around six hours and drew a lot of attention from onlookers.
“We have to treat every incident like this as serious,” he said. “It did appear to be a pipe bomb. It was a damn costly deal for registration papers.”

I think this joke is hillarious.

2007-05-21T20:54:00.000-05:00

The Magician and the Parrot

There was magician on a cruise ship, and he was really good.
He was performing the highlight of his show when a parrot walked onstage and squawked, ''It's in his sleeve!''
The magician chased the bird away.

The next day the magician was performing his highlight again (in front of a smaller audience) when the parrot walked onstage and declared, ''It's in his pocket!''

The next day, as he was performing the highlight, he saw the parrot in the crowd. But before the parrot could ruin the magic trick, the boat crashed into a rock and sank.

The magician was lucky enough to find a board to hang on to. On the other end of the board was the parrot.
They stared at each other for three full days, neither of them saying anything, when suddenly the parrot said, ''I give up, what'd you do with the ship?''

Webpage Update

2007-05-09T14:39:00.000-05:00

http://www.geocities.com/kathayj/

I added some new files to the Academic Shrine, and a while back I added a whole load of pictures. Go take a peek, and don't forget to sign my guestbook so I know you came to see me.

The good stuff in Kansas.

2007-05-06T09:42:00.000-05:00

Friday night a monster tornado decided to pay us a visit here in Kansas. This big fella wiped out nearly all of the town of Greensburg, which is about 100 miles south of Hays. The town is now evacuated and crews are trying to clear roads so that people can come and see if there is anything left to be salvaged. These are the significant numbers:

90% of the town is gone.

1 building without structural damage- the courthouse.

9 fatalities resulting from Friday night.

Round 2 on Saturday had tornadoes in 12 counties and wind up to 90 MPH.

If you're wondering about the good stuff I was referring to here it is:

Within hours of the Greensburg tornado, which happened around 9:45 PM, crews were coming from all areas to help with search and rescue, and clean-up. Some from over 200 miles away.

The KWCH/KBSH news team (channel 7 on my rabbit ears) was on the air for 27 straight, commercial-free hours with damage reports and weather warnings. They were completely amazing. I checked another station but it was on commercial at that moment. This is why I watch CBS instead of ABC.

Luckily (and strangely) the storms wrapped all the way around Hays, and we have fared pretty well this weekend. There is a bit of a thunderstorm over us right now but it's very calm a lovely. (So I say now.)

Georgie Jr. has been on the ball today declaring emergencies and disasters and all that official stuff. The visibly and obviously distressed citizens of Greensburg and the surrounding areas are not feeling sorry for themselves, and seem just as concerned about the future of their town as they are about their personal belongings. Every person interviewed says that the most important thing is that most people are OK, and now they just have to figure out where to start cleaning up and rebuilding.

Though it is lacking in several areas, this is the beauty of the Midwest. Shelters were set up immediately in nearby communities. Supplies were being collected from communities all over Kansas by the next morning. Search and rescue crews, as well as regular people with the right equipment, came from all over to help out. Our Kansas representatives went to the President immediately to request aid. And best of all, everybody is ready to start rebuilding. First thing's first--clean-up before rebuilding. Less than 48 hours ago nearly everything they own was demolished; they don't know when or how but they will get things back to normal because that's the way we do things in Tornado Alley.

My Rules of Acceptance

2007-05-01T15:36:00.000-05:00

My Rules of Acceptance
http://www.geocities.com/kathayj/Rules.html

Thanks to the Beamer brothers I was inspired to make a list. I'm sure it'll make me a better person in the end.

All I can say is: What the fuck?

2007-04-18T22:04:00.000-05:00

WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE? Jesus there is something seriously wrong with this place and these idiot people.
If I could remember what these beyond stupid people said I would quote them. But the main point from several people interviewed in Wichita was that they think students should be able to carry guns on campus. Their reasoning...get this...is that people would be able to protect themselves against psychos. Apparently someone could have taken out the shooter before he shot so many people.
WHAT IF THE PSYCHO IS THE DUDE WITH THE GUN SITTING NEXT TO YOU IN CLASS?
Is there a high percentage of brain deficiency in Wichita? Actually I can tell you there is just from watching the news.
Now they're talking about the abortion ban on the news. Fan-frickin-tastic. Thank god senior citizen assholes are making decisions for me. I don't think "partial birth abortions" are a good idea, and can be avoided nearly all of the time and that has nothing to do with the ban. The ban is the first step toward banning all abortions and removing rights from women. I can't even describe how baffling it is that humans do not understand equal rights for all people. It's not a difficult concept, Jesus has nothing to do with it, and if you don't agree with someone elses choices then shut the hell up and go make your own choices.
If the future mothers of America don't die in childbirth, not to fear...they can just enroll in college and get shot by someone who doesn't agree with them in art class.